Life Is But A Dream
by SumrBrezze
Summary: Row, row, row your boat.  Gently down the...  Okay, 1- This story has nothing to do with boats and 2- Everything to do with Minx
1. Chapter 1

"_This is not the ending I want."_

"Tell me about it," she mumbled just seconds before she opened her eyes and stared up toward the ceiling. Chocolate orbs scanned the ceiling while she attempted to remember what she had just been dreaming about. Unfortunately, the more she tried to concentrate the more the already elusive dream drifted away until all she could recall was being at the Chandler mansion, free-flowing premium champagne and Marissa looking gorgeous (as usual in her opinion) in a copperish dress, which embraced her in all the correct places.

Tell me about it.

_Tell me about what?_ She wondered. Why had she responded with that on the cusp of consciousness and what and to whom exactly had she offered the response? And why was she allowing it to bother her so much? Plenty of times over the years Bianca would awaken from a slippery dream but if she failed to recall it within a few moments she would let it go. For some peculiar reason it was difficult to let this one go.

"Tell me about it," she whispered into the quiet bedroom as though that would help. Five seconds afterward she sighed. It didn't. "Oh, forget it." Bianca glanced toward her left where the alarm clock rested upon the nightstand. Verdant digital numbers informed her that it was 5:46 a.m. Turning to the right, she pressed her lips to the nearby cheek of a softly snoring redhead. With a smile tugging at her mouth, Bianca carefully rose from their bed and headed into the adjoining bathroom to take care of some morning business.

Nine minutes later she returned with an empty bladder, minty breath and scrubbed face. Reclaiming her spot, which remained warm in her absence, Bianca lay on her back with her hands linked behind her head. She was contemplating whether to fix French toast or buttermilk pancakes for the five of-oh, wait the seven of them. She quietly chuckled, having forgotten that they were babysitting her nephews since Kendall and Zach were on their way to New York this morning for a little romantic alone time.

Eyes shutting, Bianca imagined surprising a certain redhead with a little romantic vacation of their own. Perhaps they could take a short trip just before the upcoming holidays went into full swing. Now where would they go? If Marissa was a fan of skiing maybe they could visit a snowy destination. She grinned as she thought of the two of them recreating their snowball fight from six months ago. Afterward, they snuggle by a roaring fireplace with a couple mugs of hot chocolate or cider.

Definitely hot chocolate. The grin broadened. If they drank hot chocolate Bianca could think of a few interesting things to do with the whipped cream. Yes, Marissa plus whipped cream filled her with such delight.

Now if her love was in the mood for some sun perhaps they could travel to an exotic beach locale. Her eyes remaining closed, practically all of her pearly whites were visible as her grin persisted. Yes, Marissa plus a bikini filled her with such delight. The brunette took a mental journey back to St. Barts where she was blessed to witness her girlfriend in a two-piece for the very first time. It was challenging to declare who was ogling Marissa more-her best friend or her ex-husband.

Her ex-husband. _JR flipping Chandler. _The grin abruptly dissipated, a frown starting to settle into place. It alarmed Bianca just how quickly her playful disposition vanished, intense anger bubbling to the surface. Her heart pounded beneath her chest, her breathing became shallow and removing her hands from behind her head she balled them into fists so tight that her palms ached. For a moment she wished that JR was there so that she could have the opportunity to put those fists to good use but then changed her mind since Bianca didn't trust herself to stop after one or two punches. Where had that come from? She was upset with him but not to that extent.

_Ice blue eyes with an inky backdrop._

Dark brown ones popped open once again searching the ceiling for answers. Pardon? What did that mean? Steady short beeping sounds broke the silence in their bedroom along with Bianca's ruminations. Now what was _that_? It reminded her of something yet she couldn't put her finger on what. She was about to sit up in order to investigate where the rhythmic beeping could be hailing from when an arm stretched across her to press a button on the alarm clock, the beeps immediately ceasing.

A crimson head resting on her shoulder brought a tiny smile to Bianca's lips. With her arm now resting across her girlfriend's stomach, Marissa asked in an adorably groggy voice, "Which one of us set the alarm to go off at 6:00 a.m. on a Saturday? Whose bright idea was it?" Slipping her fingers underneath the bottom of Bianca's t-shirt she stroked the warm skin of her side eliciting instant tingles in the brunette.

Snuggling obviously a cure, her bad mood began to lift as she softly chuckled. "Not I. _All_ my ideas are genuinely bright."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yep. You didn't know that?"

"I've suspected that a lot of your ideas are bright, but I wouldn't go so far as to say _all_ of them are."

"Well you need to pay closer attention." She planted a kiss on Marissa's head when the smaller woman started laughing. "I can name at least three bright ideas off the top of my head."

"Yeah? Shoot."

Several seconds passed by without Bianca uttering a word. "Honey that's your cue to start. I'm listening." Not a peep out of the woman partially beneath her. Had she fallen back to sleep that swiftly? Reluctantly raising her head from a comfortable shoulder, Marissa discovered that her girlfriend was wide-awake, her eyes focused on the ceiling. She appeared befuddled and…was that fear? "Bianca?" Marissa whispered, gently pressing her palm to the other woman's cheek.

Rapidly blinking, Bianca refocused on a concerned face. She tried to smile but she wasn't certain how successful she was. "Sorry sweetheart. I was thinking."

The concern didn't waver. "About what?"

"Um, milk." Bianca Montgomery had her share of skills. Falsification wasn't one of them, so she wasn't the least bit surprised at the raised eyebrow and disbelieving look cast in her direction. "You know…for breakfast. I'm not sure we have enough milk for the seven of us. You want pancakes or French toast?"

"I want truth."

"Don't think I've heard of that. You have the recipe handy?" Damn. Not a giggle, not even a ghost of a smile and at this point she might be desperate enough to accept a smirk.

"Bianca tell me what's wrong. Please."

She sighed. "I can't."

"Why not?" Marissa began stroking the cheek that she still held. "Baby you must realize that you can tell me anything."

"I know I can." Her heart resumed it's earlier pounding and she sent a quick prayer that Marissa didn't detect it.

"So tell me."

"I…can't." Bianca observed that her girlfriend was about to argue so she added, "Because I don't have a clue what's wrong. I just…I just woke up this morning feeling a little odd, but it'll pass. Please try not to worry." She leaned up enough to kiss what may have been the softest mouth on the planet. "Now I was supposed to list a trio of my bright ideas." The stubborn redhead stared her down until she began to fidget. Another louder sigh ensued. "Not long before the alarm clock had you saying your goodbyes to the sandman I woke up from what I'm beginning to suspect was a nightmare. I'm not sure…it was so fuzzy," Bianca paused, striving to produce the words to explain. "It's like trying to put a thousand piece puzzle together without having the picture on the box of what it's supposed to look like when finished." When an index finger trailed a short path to her parted lips and proceeded to trace them her heart pounded for a different reason.

Her eyes following what her finger was doing, Marissa softly inquired, "What section or sections of the puzzle _have_ you been able to figure out?"

Bianca shook her head. "It's just various images that I'm unable to piece together. Honestly there isn't anything concrete that I could share with you." She gazed up at a woman who may have been the most ravishing on the planet. "Well except for one detail."

"What's that baby?"

Bianca didn't realize she was crying until warm tears slid down her face and dampened the pillow beneath her head. While she swallowed around the sudden lump in her throat Marissa whisked a few of the tears away using the padding of her thumbs. Truly, what was wrong with her? Her emotions were all over the place today and the day had just begun. She had to get it together. There were five children hopefully still slumbering that were depending on the two grownups in the house to provide them with a fun filled Saturday. _An entertaining day they'll have, so take a chill pill. Chill pill. Is that idiom still current? _Bianca Montgomery had her share of skills. Keeping abreast of the latest slang words and phrases definitely wasn't one of them.

"Bianca?"

The brunette blinked lashes that were still wet although she had stopped crying. "Sorry. Did I drift again?"

The other woman nodded and kissed her forehead. "What can I do for you?" Crying may have been contagious between the couple because Marissa's eyes were now glistening.

Placing her arms securely around her girlfriend's waist, Bianca smoothly flipped them over so that Marissa was on her back and she atop her. Arms braced on either side of Marissa's head, she tenderly smiled when a pair of shapely exposed legs wrapped around her. Although a tear escaped with it, her smile was returned.

"It has me thinking about how precious life is and how we should take full advantage of every day, every hour, every minute because it can be over or abysmally disrupted in an instant." Bianca shivered although far from feeling chilly. Pressing their foreheads together she whispered, "One detail. I can't lose you."

"No, absolutely one hundred and fifty percent no. You won't lose me," Marissa fervently returned in her own whisper. "Baby it was only a dream. I'm here, right here and I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." Could anyone truly make such an affirmation? No, but she was riding on faith that five decades from now she would still be sharing a bed, a home and a life with this incredible woman. Their foreheads still touching, she stroked the nape of her girlfriend's neck. "Who was it that stated we were a package deal?"

A little smile took up residence on Bianca's lips. "I believe that was me."

"Please explain how we can be a package deal if we're separated."

The brunette shrugged. "Unable to."

"Exactly. So you're stuck with me."

Raising her head, Bianca looked at the woman beneath her while a grin bloomed. "Totally sucks to be me then." She quickly joined in when Marissa started to laugh. Upon sobering she whispered, "I love you."

The couple smacked their lips together. "Love you right back."


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks so much for the reviews! I intended to wait until after the weekend to post the next chapter, but I have all the control of the average eight-year-old locked in a candy store. BTW, no offense meant to 8yo's ;-) Hope ya'll like it!

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><p>"<em>Now<em> may I share my three bright ideas with you?"

"Sh-I'm all ears." When Bianca started to shift to the left side of their bed Marissa asked her where she was going.

"I don't want to keep weighing you down so I'm moving back to my spot." She giggled when a mouth pecked her on the nose and then a soft moan followed when those touchable legs tightened around her waist.

"Did you hear me complaining?" Grinning, the redhead added, "Right now I'm your spot lady. Unless you have a problem with that."

Bianca shook her head so vigorously she should have developed whiplash. Who in their right mind would have an issue with Marissa Tasker's legs around their person? "Nope."

"Okay then. Please proceed. What's your first bright idea?"

"When I admitted that I had feelings for you."

Marissa promptly scowled although it was directed at herself. "And then I in turn reacted quite 'un' brightly." _JR flipping Chandler. _His face should have been bruised just from the many thoughts Marissa had lately of slapping or decking him.

"Aw, don't be so hard on yourself. It took you less than a week to come to your senses." A hand selected one of her butt cheeks to greet causing Bianca to gasp quite dramatically. "Ms. Tasker I can't believe you just slapped me!" An apology was offered yet the mischievous smile on her face had her girlfriend doubting its sincerity. "Uh huh."

Marissa's impish tinged smile didn't waver. "I wholeheartedly agree with that idea. Very bright indeed. What's next?"

Bianca proved that she could adopt a mischievous smile too. "When I asked Sienna out on a date." She had to bite down quite hard on her lower lip to keep from laughing when the other woman growled.

"Going out on a date with Si- that other lawyer was a bright idea?" Another growl, yet softer than the last escaped. Okay, deep down the redhead realized that she was being ridiculous where Sienna was concerned. It wasn't as if anything more happened between she and Bianca other than a kiss on the cheek and even if it had Marissa didn't have any room to complain. _After all, I had just gone to bed with that slick haired SOB, _Marissa begrudgingly thought. Suddenly she wanted to slap or deck herself.

The brunette nodded. "Mmhmm. I think it helped you along the journey of discovering your feelings for _me_."

A curious brow rose. "Is that why you went out with her?"

"No, I was really trying to move on and I liked her. Sienna is a sweetheart. Running into you and-that person you were previously married to was just a coincidence. My having a date and you becoming all flustered and dare I say jealous was just icing on the chocolate cake-ow! Really? Another one?" Although her right butt cheek now stung, it was surprisingly much more of a pleasant than achy sensation. Regardless, she wasn't about to admit that.

"You brought it on yourself."

"For relaying the truth?" Bianca was actually a smidgen disappointed that response didn't merit her another slap. Instead her girlfriend gave her an authentic apology.

"You were right-both times. I shouldn't have run away from you in the first place and that day at Krystal's I was obnoxiously jealous when I didn't have any right to be. Sienna…um she did seem sweet although this being a small town I just know one day soon I'll run into her when we're behaving all lovey-dovey together and she'll probably give me an 'I told you so' look if not verbalize the actual words."

Appearing thoughtful, Bianca's mouth opened and closed several times before she spoke. "I'd like to give replies to everything you just said. First, thanks for admitting that I was right. I rather enjoy being right." A dark brown eye winked when Marissa predictably smirked. "Second, the important thing is you returned and that was one of the most incredible days of my life." She beamed when that response earned her a tender kiss along with a brief cheek stroke. "Third, I wouldn't call you obnoxious. In retrospect I deemed your behavior amusing. A touch manic yet amusing all the same." The brunette grinned while the redhead resumed smirking. "Fourth, the term 'lovey-dovey' used to describe us-that's fifteen levels of cute." Hazel eyes rolled though there was a smile on Marissa's face. "And fifth, I told you so? What exactly did you two have to say to each other while I was left alone with…him?"

"Uh, may I give you the Cliff Notes?"

Bianca chuckled. "Sure thing."

"Sienna asked me how long had I been attracted to you and my wussified self denied it with great enthusiasm although it was quite obvious that she didn't believe me. And when she asked me if she stood a chance with you my deeply hidden internal response was 'over my dead body' but I merely said that she should ask you." She had to smile when Bianca buried her face in her neck and proceeded to laugh so exuberantly that the headboard thumped against the wall. When she finally raised her head, there were tears in her eyes. "You find somethin' funny lady?"

Bianca nodded. "Oh, yes."

"What?" Marissa asked as if she didn't already know.

"You. Adorable, beautiful and enchanting you."

The lawyer felt her cheeks reddening. Aw, she hadn't expected a trio of compliments. Someone deserved a kiss…or several. A few more than several moan inducing kisses later, Marissa had one hand cupping a nether cheek and the other stroking the length of her girlfriend's back underneath her t-shirt. While the most enticing hips languidly rocked against her, she trailed swollen lips along Bianca's jaw and to the ridge of her ear.

"You know what I want?" She whispered just before enveloping a lobe and beginning to suckle. Marissa moaned when those hips sped up slightly in response.

Her voice husky, the brunette answered, "Anything sweetie. I'll give you anything." Oh why hadn't she gone to illusionist school? She wished that she could just snap her fingers and make the few clothes that they were wearing disappear.

"Anything?" Marissa confirmed, her breath warm against a dampened ear.

"Oooh yeah."

"Pancakes."

"Pardon?"

"No, pancakes. Buttermilk preferably." She endeavored to keep a straight face when graced with an incredulous stare.

"Er…um…you want me to um...go prepare breakfast?" _Now? _With roguish thoughts of a certain yummy redhead running rampant through her brain how was she supposed to concentrate on making breakfast? Why at this point it was positively dangerous for her to operate a spatula, much less a stove!

Marissa nodded. "I'd be delighted to help you cook." Her fingers danced up the smooth skin of the other woman's back. "After I help you come."

Her incredulous expression becoming a thing of the past once that second sentence sank in, a grin started to materialize. "Why Ms. Tasker I do believe that sounds like a mighty fine plan. Of course you'll have to come too."

"But of course Ms. Montgomery. In fact, I think we should come as closely together as is possible."

"Agreed!"

"So."

"So…" The moment Bianca felt fingers slowly pushing her t-shirt upward she raised her body to kneel between her girlfriend's legs and removed the thin garment. Before she could resume her position on top of her human body pillow, a soft palm pressed against her chest until she landed on her butt none too gracefully. As she stretched her legs out she heard the tiny beginnings of a chuckle and quickly looked up, perfectly plucked eyebrows skyrocketing.

"You okay?" Marissa asked through her chuckling.

"First you smack me, then you shove me and now you laugh while asking if I'm all right? Look up sadistic in the dictionary and you might find your picture."

"Tsk tsk. I think we're exaggerating."

Somehow Bianca's eyebrows traveled higher. "Oh, we are?"

"Yes, definitely. I gave you two tushie taps and a moment ago a slight nudge that caused you to shift backward a bit awkwardly." Bianca's left leg touching her right, she reached out to run her fingers along it, starting from her ankle and pausing at her knee. "Regardless, allow me to make those minor offenses up to you. I've um…I've been doing some reading online. Research." Marissa's cheeks turning rosy, she ducked her head, watching as her fingers traced the outline of Bianca's knee.

Spotting the sudden blush, Bianca felt the intrigue welling within her. The word 'research' had never sounded so fascinating to her. "What did you research?" She found herself inquiring in a hushed tone.

"Have you ever um…you probably have…" Marissa trailed off, the condition of her cheeks now making rosy appear pale.

"Have I ever…" Thrumming. Her body was actually thrumming while she waited for her girlfriend to build up the courage to finish the sexually based query. Finally she whispered it, but Bianca had to ask her to repeat.

Hazel eyes remained focused on a knee as she cleared her throat. "Tribbing. You familiar with that?" A sharp intake of breath caused Marissa to raise her head, catching an astonished expression. Mere seconds later Bianca's own cheeks took on a bit of coloring. Okay, the redhead had part of her answer. Obviously the other woman recognized the term, but she was she yay or nay on the idea of performing it?

The younger woman slowly nodded, a tongue swiping across her lips before teeth briefly sank into the lower one. "I uh…have. I've heard of it but I don't have much experience with it." Noticing Marissa's quizzical expression she decided to further clarify. "Neither of us knew about that name at the time, but we did attempt a specific position that I later discovered was in the tribbing 'family'. However, it didn't work for us. There wasn't enough of a pleasurable connection so…that was that." Bianca wondered which of them currently needed a fire extinguisher to the face more. "In a nutshell, I basically know what it involves but that's the extent of my practicing it."

"Okay, so you wouldn't be interested."

"Now did I say that?" The brunette grinned faintly. "For you, with you I'd be willing to try again. That phrase practice makes perfect applies here. Besides," she indicated her naked torso, "I've already removed my t-shirt so you might as well take advantage." The grin increased when her partner chuckled.


	3. Chapter 3

**Once again I thank ya'll for the blush producing reviews. So inspiring! **

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><p>"Shame on me." Eyes lowering, they shifted from left to right and then back again. "I've been ignoring the girls," Marissa softly stated while reaching forward to circle a sensitive bud. "Do you think they'll forgive me?" Her finger continued its perusal as she detected Bianca's aspirations quickening.<p>

"I'm positive they will." Bianca's hands clutched the bedspread. She groaned when an index finger and thumb tweaked her already hardening nipple. "Neither of them is keen on holding grudges." Within moments she found herself with a lapful of scrumptious lawyer, a soft mouth meshing with her own. The bedspread released, she placed her hands on hips partially covered by a pair of those oh so sexy boyshorts Marissa was fond of wearing, moaning as a welcomed tongue greeted hers.

With the weather changing she would miss the boyshorts and tank top ensembles her lover often wore to bed. At that moment Bianca vowed not to let autumn and then its relative winter stand in the way of her sexy underwear appreciation time. If necessary she would keep burning logs in their master suite fireplace and blast the heat through the vents to hopefully prevent Marissa from wearing too many clothes to bed.

_Huh. Just discovered that I might be mildly perverted…and kind of crazy._ However, her libido was much too escalated for Bianca to care and truth be told she'd held suspicions for years that she was at least a little bit crazy. But hey, what Kane wasn't?

And speaking of turning up the heat, the redhead was proving to be quite adept at that as her mouth created a damp trail to her girlfriend's neck, quickly finding an already racing pulse point and somehow doubling it. When a whispered voice requested for her to lay down she eagerly complied, her naked back connecting with the bedspread and lascivious chocolate orbs focused toward the ceiling. Okay, with soft lips returning to her neck and a hand caressing her side, those eyes weren't exactly focused on the ceiling but they did recognize its existence.

Down, down, oh God how deliciously downward that mouth gradually traveled choosing to spend significant time visiting the previously ignored 'girls'. The ceiling eradicated from her thoughts, the brunette's eyes slipped closed, her lips parted as she began to softly pant and her back arched causing more of her right breast to slide into an inviting mouth. While Bianca gently grabbed a handful of scarlet locks, front teeth tugged on a turgid nipple before a tongue laved it and flicked back and forth until the younger woman squirmed. When Marissa switched over to the left breast because she just didn't want it to feel forlorn she heard her name being murmured.

"Yes?" She drew out the word as she looked up toward glazed brown eyes, which opened upon her speaking.

Bianca swallowed, fingers unconsciously massaging the back of her girlfriend's head. "No…thing. Just…just needed to say your name," she responded, surprised that she could string a sentence together.

A suggestive gleam entered hazel eyes. "I'm curious to hear how many more times I can cause you to say my name this early morning."

Bianca lifted the index finger on her free hand. "One down…"

"Huh. How did you know I was going in that direction?"

"Psychic."

Fingers traced a haphazard course across a thoroughly kissable stomach eliciting further squirming from its owner. Marissa noticed the subtle push on the back of her head yet purposefully disregarded what it meant for the time being. "Really?" She barely concealed a grin as her girlfriend released a sound akin to a growl. "What do you see in your future?"

"Hopefully an orgasm."

Had she been partaking of a beverage during the moment the other woman offered that reply Marissa was certain she would have sprayed the contents of her mouth over their bed. Instead she exploded with laughter sans liquid. Although Bianca neglected to join her, she did faintly smile. Once the redhead reigned in her laughing fit, the smile flourished as she pulled off her tank top revealing her own 'girls'. Leaning over Bianca she tenderly kissed her forehead.

"I'm sorry baby," she whispered. "No more teasing." Both women moaned in harmony when Marissa lay on top of her partner, their breasts coming into perfect sensuous contact as did their mouths. With Bianca's legs wrapped around her waist she caressed the back of her thigh, feeling it quiver against her palm. Leaving those lips, she kissed a short path to a pinkened ear. "You're so damn soft and warm," Marissa quietly intoned, relishing the sound of Bianca's breath hitching when she slid her hand further up her thigh and underneath her shorts. "I love touching you." Hand completely hidden under those encumbering shorts her fingers grazed the edge of silk panties. "Could never get enough of touching you…and tasting you."

Down, down, oh God her mouth headed downward again, progressing lower than it had during the previous journey. That stomach which Marissa deemed kissable only a few minutes ago was feasted upon and then its navel explored, her girlfriend moaning each time her tongue dipped within. Legs coming to rest on the bed, Bianca raised her hips to assist in the removal of her shorts, deft fingers able to slide her panties off concurrently. Head between her girlfriend's thighs, Marissa stroked an index finger along swollen labia, moisture quickly collecting on the digit. Hazel eyes meeting brown, Marissa swirled her tongue around her finger prior to sucking it clean while Bianca watched, suddenly wishing that she could be an index finger.

"You my dear taste divine." Using both hands she parted her lover, cool air reaching her dampness seconds before a hot mouth partook of a divine investigation. Immediately, Bianca attempted to utter an 'oh God', but she forgot about the d while her hips bucked. Eyelids blocking her view and hands wrinkling the bedspread, she gasped as a tongue roamed along her outer and inner lips, performing a languid dance up and down and from side to side. When instructed to do so Bianca couldn't comply fast enough, bending her knees so that her feet were flat on the bed, thighs falling open to expose more of what Marissa sought.

With another 'oh Gah', she reached down to cup the back of her lover's bobbing head, tingles racing throughout her body, all the way to the tips of wiggling toes. While the fingers of Marissa's right hand held her open, her left index and middle digits repeatedly tantalized her slickened entrance, tongue lapping the area above. Just when the brunette thought those fingers would finally fill her they retreated again causing her to release a small disapproving groan.

"Liar," the brunette hoarsely stated. Another groan left her lips when she no longer felt her lover's expert tongue or hands touching her. _Just had to comment, didn't you?_ Bianca inwardly chastised herself. _She'll never let you come n-hey wait. Is she kissing you? _Head raised, she delightedly watched Marissa littering her stomach with damp audible kisses; the path she traveled leading her toward the valley of those beloved 'girls'. _Oh good. Maybe she didn't hear that. _Resting her head and shutting her eyes, Bianca contentedly sighed as a tender mouth showered appreciation between and over the swell of her breasts.

By the time that mouth rediscovered the pulse point in her neck, wandering hands had a nice grasp on a boyshorts covered bottom, giving it a couple of experimental squeezes. Bianca moaned moments later when her lower lip was nipped followed by several firm kisses on her mouth. Before she could deepen their contact her girlfriend pulled away.

"Did you just call me the l word?"

Reluctantly opening her eyes, she observed the vaguely smirking countenance hovering about eight inches above her own. "Um…your sexual orientation is up to you to determine. I'm just on cloud nine that you four letter l word me."

Torn between displaying another smirk and smiling, Marissa finally settled on the latter. "I earnestly do four letter l word you baby, but we both know I wasn't referring to that seven letter l word."

"Oh! You mean liar?"

A smirk sneaked onto the redhead's lips. "Yes, lady. That one."

"I said that 'cause you promised that you wouldn't tease me anymore and seconds before I used that particular four letter l word your fingers were most definitely teasing the hell out of me."

"I see." An eyebrow slowly rose. "So I'm a liar now?"

"With proper incentive I'd be willing to recant." Bianca noticed another squeeze of her buttocks had her girlfriend grinning.

"Is that right?" Marissa grinded her hips into the woman lying beneath her, watching as her eyelids grew heavy.

"Mm, yes. So, so very right." Beginning to move her own hips, she cupped Marissa's gyrating cheeks a bit tighter. Once they shared a brief yet heated kiss, she murmured against her lips, "That feels…really nice."

"I concur. But I think more incentive is crucial," Marissa responded, dropping another kiss on an addicting mouth. Getting to her knees first, she sat back just long enough to remove her underwear, practically feeling alert eyes following the boyshorts as they slid down her thighs, legs, ankles and finally over her feet. Brown met winking hazel once the underwear was tossed to the carpet. Back on her knees, Marissa crawled closer to the other woman while maintaining eye contact.

Subconsciously licking her lips while focused on a pair of gently swaying breasts, Bianca stated in a singsong voice, "You're officially naked Ms. Tasker."

The redhead emitted a light chuckle. "And you're astute Ms. Montgomery." Stroking the inner region of her left thigh, she almost shyly inquired how far Bianca could elevate her leg. Told that it was her choice when she asked which leg she should lift, the brunette quickly decided on the left, lifting it so high that her knee was in the vicinity of Marissa's right breast. To help keep her steady, Marissa grasped her just above the knee, fingers splayed along the front of a strong thigh.

Implosion. That was the word to spring to her muddled brain when the other woman executed her next move. Her body was dangerously close to imploding the second Marissa straddled the apex of her thighs, positioning her center atop Bianca's throbbing one. Talk about 'oh Gah'. Bianca was certain that her eyes temporarily rolled to the back of her head as her girlfriend proceeded to gently rock against her.

"Ma…Marissa…"

"That's twice," the redhead breathlessly commented.

Bianca nodded with a fleeting grin. "Uh huh." She slid her hands up the other woman's stomach and reaching her breasts she cupped each one, brushing her thumbs across their erect tips. A part of her yearned to sit up so that she could sample them, but she was enjoying the view of Marissa's petite and entrancing figure from her current vantage point too much.

Oh, God could she feel her so extraordinarily, the both of them opened so well with this position. Moaning her lover's name Bianca lowered arms that had become too wobbly, instead clutching the backs of Marissa's thighs.

"Thrice," the redhead whispered, hooded eyes on the woman below her while she applied further pressure, gradually increasing the thrusts of her hips. Bianca's name stumbled from her mouth and she shuddered along with her partner when their engorged clits connected.

A fine sheen of perspiration covering their bodies, they caused the headboard to rhythmically bang against the wall as intensifying moans collided in the air. One, two, three more times the brunette uttered her name, yet Marissa was too far along to concentrate on keeping count. Plus the fact that her heart was pounding within her ears made it difficult to hear Bianca's breathy calls. One, two, three more thrusts and she was positive that she wouldn't last much longer.

"Ooh…I…I'm coming," the younger woman said, unaware that she vocalized her lover's reflections. Fingers pressing into the flesh of Marissa's thighs, she felt those familiar exquisite sensations building within her stomach. One, two, three seconds later their bodies managed to simultaneously implode and they shared a nonsensical language while wave after wave of pleasure finally delivered their releases.

Still breathing quite heavily, Marissa guided her girlfriend's leg to the bed and then crawled up her body to crash their mouths together. Although sated, she moaned when Bianca's legs wrapped around her while she zealously returned the ravenous kiss. Along with their heartbeats, it slowly calmed down until their lips were just lightly grazing. Several small kisses later, Marissa managed to tear herself away from such a tempting mouth. Chin perched in her right hand; she softly smiled at the younger woman while her left hand tenderly brushed back dampened dark strands.

"So."

"So…" Gazing up at a woman who was definitely the most beautiful on the planet, Bianca returned that smile.

"Was it…was that…you know?"

Bianca grinned. "Nope, I don't believe I do." Detecting the faintest of growls she snickered.

"You said the uh last time the connection wasn't pleasurable enough." Her cheeks ablaze, Marissa lightly cleared her throat. "Not that I need a full critique. I would just like to know if it was okay this time…with me."

"Okay?" Fingers dancing along her partner's side, Bianca shook her head. "No it was absolutely not okay. Okay does not do it justice. It was more like…" Glancing toward the ceiling, she searched her mental dictionary. "Mind-blowing, invigorating, out of this world-no. Out of the universe!" Her bobbing eyebrows had Marissa laughing although her blush mounted.

"So basically you're saying it was pretty good."

She nodded. "Think I may have an 'I love tribbing' t-shirt made with a heart where the word 'love' should be. On the back would be a couple of stick figure females engaged in the position you just used on me."

Marissa laughed with such exuberance the headboard banged again. "I dare you to wear that in front of your mom."

"That sweetheart is a bet I would lose. Your mom on the other hand…" Bianca giggled. "For some reason I think Krystal may get a kick out of that kind of shirt." Joining in on the giggle fest, the redhead promptly agreed. "You know what?"

Mimicking Bianca's earlier tone she replied, "Nope, I don't believe I do."

"We've just made love, we're laying here naked and still glistening from the most mind-blowing exercise and we're talking about our mothers."

"Ew." Marissa's face scrunched up causing the other woman to giggle once more. "Yeah, that's weird. Let's discuss something else. Whaddya wanna get into next lady?" During the next few seconds all was silent in the room until an imaginary light bulb concurrently clicked on above their heads and they not only thought but spoke at the same time.

"Breakfast."

"Shower."

They chuckled, Marissa soon speaking first. "Although I'm just about craving those pancakes, I'm intrigued by your shower idea. I take it that would be done couplet style." When Bianca nodded she added, "So you wash my back and I'll wash yours?" Brown eyes bright, her girlfriend nodded again. "Last one to arrive in the bathroom is a…um…gets to admire her girlfriends' backside."

Apparently keen on admiration neither of the pair budged. The first to capitulate, the redhead kissed Bianca before rolling off of her and getting to her feet. In all her naked glory she sashayed toward the bathroom, laughing as she heard an appreciative whistle and a line that some would be complimented by while others found offense. Of course Marissa was in the former group.

"I hate to see you go but I love watching you leave!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, how much do I adore ya'll? About thiiiiiiiis much! I do so much appreciate the reviews. BTW, Wednesday happens to be my birthday. Just throwin' out random information. Nope, not like I'm trying to hint for b-day reviews or anything ;-) Truly, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me. Now on to the ladies…**

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Once both arrived in the bathroom, Marissa had the fantastic idea for them to switch that couplet shower into a bubble bath, Bianca agreeing before she could barely get the suggestion out. Ten minutes later they were soaking amongst a mountain of honey vanilla scented bubbles, romance laced music emanating from the mp3 player settled in its docking station on the countertop. Seated between Marissa's legs, the brunette sat up in order to make it easier for soapy hands to glide along her back.

"You didn't finish, you know."

Just mentally singing along with Barry White and therefore a bit distracted, Bianca thought she might have missed the beginning of this conversation. "I didn't?"

"Mmhmm." Squirting more body wash onto her palms, Marissa rubbed them together to disperse the fragrant liquid soap before beginning to massage her girlfriend's shoulders. An immediate approving moan had her smiling. "That was only two."

"Two?"

"Mmhmm."

"How many should it be?"

"Three. It's okay though because it was my fault that you have an incomplete. However, you were bragging about three, so I feel like you owe me one more."

"Me brag?" The water sloshed when she broke its surface to press her hand to her chest. Glancing over her shoulder, she caught a faint grin. "Why I never brag!"

"Never?"

"No, never."

"Never say never baby."

"Is there anything you'd like me to say instead?" Somewhat reluctantly ending her massage, the brunette repositioned herself so that she was facing the other woman, her back against the opposite side of the tub. Searching for Marissa's hands beneath the bubbles, she finally grasped them and began to tug. Catching on without Bianca having to verbalize what she wanted, the redhead moved forward and straddled her lap. She wrapped damp arms around her neck while observing the mischievous grin on her lips. "Or do?"

An eyebrow arched. "Do?" Bianca nodded. "You want something to do?" When she nodded with a bit more enthusiasm Marissa chuckled. "Please divulge what it is that you'd like to do?"

"Since I posed that question to you, you should give _me_ an answer. What Ms. Tasker may I do for you? With you?" Her eyebrows comically bobbed. "_To_ you?"

Despite the eyebrow dance her voice took on a super sexy and husky tone that sent the mini butterflies in Marissa's stomach into flight. She had to clear her throat before attempting speech. "I could um…provide you with an answer to all three-'For', 'With' and 'To'. In fact, I'd prefer to answer in that order. What you can do _for_ me is to finish your list."

"My list?"

"Yes, number three."

"Ah, three. Back to the mysterious three. If you'd be so kind, please jog my memory sweetheart."

Doing a not so good impersonation of her girlfriend, Marissa said, "I can name at least three bright ideas off the top of my head." She paused just because she suddenly needed to deliver a quick resounding kiss to those lips. "And yet I've only heard two of 'em. So lady what's the third?"

The imaginary light bulb above Bianca's head switched on. "Oh! _That_ number three! Give me a minute." While she thought, Marissa busied herself by bending backwards enough so that she could dunk her head in the tub, fiery tendrils spreading out along the surface of the water. The younger woman didn't realize that she swiped her tongue over her lips while she observed honey vanilla bubbles sliding away to reveal Marissa's proudly jutting breasts. Hands resting on her lover's sides, she willed them to remain immobile although they were itching to travel upward.

Eventually, Bianca was able to produce enough sound to converse in an adequate manner. "Oh, that's helpful."

"Hmm?" Straightening up, Marissa slicked her hair back while trying to restrain a grin because she noticed Bianca's heavier breathing. "What's helpful?"

"You and your 'girls' there. I was going for a touch of sarcasm." The brunette smirked. "How am I supposed to think with them looking oh so…delectable?"

"Aw, I have delectable boobs? Thank you baby!" That grin could no longer be controlled as she pressed them against Bianca and kissed the tip of her nose. That grin broadened once she heard a petite moan. "You know, you're not supposed to be thinking. The point of the exercise was that you could name a trio of great ideas without having to delve into your brain."

"And I had them all but you distracted me. Not that I'm complaining." She briefly smiled while reminiscing over their earlier activities. "I just needed a moment to retrieve the third."

"Have you?"

"Yep, even with your thrusting breasts."

"You mean my thrusting _delectable_ breasts."

Bianca softly chuckled. "You're absolutely right sweetheart. Can't forget that they're delecta - God, Marissa stop wriggling."

"Why?"

"Because you're sitting on top of me wet and naked and I learned early on that it doesn't take much for you to get me excited. Because of you I currently have the libido of a teenager and I doubt that'll change anytime soon." The redhead appeared supremely thrilled about that and Bianca couldn't help but to softly laugh. "And if you want my third great idea you'll have to cease distracting me."

"Okay, I'll be good." Feigning innocence, Marissa batted her eyelashes. "What's number three lady?"

"When I asked you to share a home with me."

The warmest smile bloomed on the lawyer's face. "That was one of the best ideas I'd ever heard. I was beyond ecstatic that your thoughts were in sync with my own."

"I was so nervous when I brought it up. Thought you might deem me a typical U-Haul lesbian." Thinking about a certain conversation she had with her sister back in July, Bianca chuckled. "I never mentioned that Kendall offered us the deed to her house, did I?"

Hazel eyes widening, Marissa shook her head. "She wanted to give us her house? She and Zach aren't looking to move are they? At least not out of town."

"No, this was about a month before she discovered that he was still alive. I had just told her about you and I and within minutes she was offering the house. Said that she wanted a fresh start with the boys. What's kind of funny is that I spoke of the U-Haul stereotype with her, saying that I didn't want to show up to our first date with the deed to a house. Flash forward a few weeks and I asked you to buy a house with me." She chuckled again. "So I guess I'm afflicted with the U-Haul syndrome after all."

"Aw, that's all right." Marissa waved a dismissive hand. "You're not alone in that affliction." They shared the most tender kiss before she continued. "Did we decide to move in together quickly? Yes, but I haven't doubted for a second that it was too soon. You Bianca Montgomery are the love of my life, my best friend, my soul mate and the keeper of my heart so why would I want to wait to begin sharing a home with you when I'm certain that what we have is so very right, everlasting and meant to be? Life is so short and precious so what is the point of waiting?"

With tears brimming in her eyes, Bianca fiercely hugged the woman straddling her. "Have I mentioned today that I love you? God, how I love you."

Beaming, Marissa pressed their foreheads together. "Yeah, but I'm never gonna tire of hearing it. And I love you too baby. So much."

Releasing a contented sigh, Bianca asked, "Was that a satisfactory number three?"

Trailing her fingers through her girlfriend's dampened hair, Marissa nodded. "You have completed the exercise." She paused, a smile in the neighborhood of naughtiness beginning to form. "Now on to what you may do _with_ me." With an already impressively high libido managing to elevate, the attentive brunette asked her to continue. Making a production out of leisurely licking her lips, Marissa concisely answered, "Pancakes."

Bianca blinked. Twice. "Pardon?"

"No, pancakes. Buttermilk preferably."

She blinked twice more. _Hmm, seems I've caught a case of déjà vu. _"Um, you want me to do buttermilk pancakes with you? Explain how that would work."

Marissa smirked. "I want you to cook pancakes with me lady."

"Ah! I can do that. We did construct that deal earlier about coming together followed by cooking together."

They shared a grin. "Yes, I recall that. However…"

"Yes?"

"Perhaps we should get the what you can do _to_ me out of the way first."

"Fine by me." Her right hand slipping below the water, Bianca inquired, "So sweetie what exactly would you like done to you?"

Immediately feeling fingers stroking along her inner thigh, Marissa lifted an eyebrow. "Presumptuous aren't you?"

"Oh, am I wrong?" The other woman's breath caught when fingers grazed her pelvic region. Brown eyes zeroed in on lips that would probably be attacked within the next fifteen seconds. "Because if I'm wrong just tell me and I'll stop."

"Ms. Montgomery don't you dare." Evidently, they were on the same page as Ms. Tasker attacked her girlfriend's mouth first.

######

Seated on the end of a freshly made bed, Bianca dressed in sweats and a t-shirt for the time being, pulled on a pair of slipper socks. While waiting for Marissa to finish dressing, she wondered if she should make hash browns as well. _Do we have enough potatoes for a sufficient batch?_ Within seconds she answered her own question with a nod, as she recalled buying a five-pound bag of russets just a few days ago. Hash browns included then. This would be quite a Saturday morning feast! _Load 'em up on carbs and then maybe we can take a trip and hit the Philadelphia Zoo._ A tiny smile curved her lips. If Marissa agreed that sounded like a great plan. Perhaps they could call Greenlee, Ryan and Emma and invite them along.

Hearing a groan, Bianca looked up as her girlfriend entered the room wearing a faint grimace and rubbing her right hand. "What's wrong sweetheart? You hurt your hand?"

Continuing to rub, Marissa occupied the space next to the other woman. "Yeah, but I have no clue how. I was just applying my facial moisturizer when it started. Actually they both ache, but my right hand is worse."

"Let me see." Reaching for her hands, Bianca inspected both sides and carefully ran her fingers over them noticing slight puffiness and discoloration on the back of Marissa's right hand. Trying to keep the bulk of her concern suppressed, she glanced up at her. "It's a bit swollen and I think there's a bruise forming. Sweetie you don't have any idea how this happened so quickly?"

"No. It's so strange." She was able to flex her fingers but not without another groan.

"I'm gonna get you a couple ibuprofen. Be right back." After depositing a gentle kiss on Marissa's hand, the brunette headed into the bathroom. Bottle of pain reliever procured from the lowest shelf in the medicine cabinet, Bianca quickly removed its childproof cap. She was about to place the plastic top on the countertop when a gasp ripped from her mouth. Weakened fingers released the cap, which fell to the bathroom rug while the bottle sailed toward the sink, oblong orange tablets skittering around the sink with a couple of them escaping through the drain.

Breaking out in a cold sweat, Bianca gripped the countertop edge as she caught her reflection through the expansive mirror, her face contorted in pain. _What the hell? _She hoped that somehow this was just a spasm but no spasm she had endured in the past ever felt this intense. It was impossible to decipher where the pain originated from as she was on fire from chest to abdomen. Not wanting to alarm Marissa, she bit down on her lower lip in an attempt to staunch the scream that yearned to break free from her throat.

That scream was successful the moment Bianca peered down toward her aquamarine t-shirt, absorbed with growing crimson stains. Becoming faint, she stumbled backward, her back connecting with the wall as her girlfriend rushed into the bathroom. Hazel eyes wide, Marissa appeared horrified as she stared at the younger woman's torso. Shaking her head, she stepped in front of Bianca, eyes still riveted on the ruined shirt.

"No," she said, the anxiousness already evident in just that one small word. "No, not again." She looked up into the wounded eyes of the woman who had so effortlessly captured her heart. "Please baby not again."


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey ya'll! I thank you for the birthday wishes and reviews. You're on the right track to figuring out what's going on. Doing something different, so I hope I've made this next chapter clear enough to understand.**

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Forgetting about her hands, Marissa hurried to the towel rack and grabbed both of their bathing towels. She was only away for three seconds but in that time Bianca had collapsed to the floor, ending up on her right side. Kneeling, Marissa helped the other woman to lie on her back and then pressed the folded towels onto her chest and stomach respectively. Eyes blurring with tears, she looked at her girlfriend whose eyes were trained on the ceiling. Her heart shattered as she spotted the tears beginning to slide from the corners of Bianca's eyes.

"Just hold on baby."

The brunette slowly blinked as she heard Marissa's plea. Why did that sound so familiar? Why did this _feel _familiar? When watery brown met watery hazel both women softly gasped as memories came flooding back.

_This is not the ending I want._

_**Along with everyone else, I watched as the unfolding argument between my mother and Uncle Jack cut into the happiness and tranquility surrounding the room. Although upset to see them obviously breaking apart, I have to admit that I wasn't surprised. They wanted entirely different things and just maybe this was for the-**_

_**I didn't understand why, but I suddenly felt an urge to turn my head toward the right side of the room as my mother hurried to catch up with Uncle Jack who was intent on leaving. What I saw toward the right, or rather who I saw caused my blood to run cold and my heart to pound.**_

_**Ice blue eyes with an inky backdrop. He was supposed to be on a plane out of Pine Valley, but there he was hiding like a coward in the Chandler tunnels with a gun aimed at Marissa. Marissa the woman who adopted and loved his son just as deeply as she would if she'd given birth to him, the woman who stood by his side and helped nurse him back to health not once but twice when he was afflicted with cancer, the woman he had spent the past several months trying to convince that he loved and cared for. This was the man who had a gun trained on her. **_

_**A gun that seemed to be aimed at Marissa's head. **__Oh, hell no._

_**It felt like one of those movies with a dramatic slo-mo scene. Pulling my arm from around my girlfriend's middle, I placed both palms flat against her back and with all the strength I could muster shoved the smaller woman forward. Although aware that the gun fired twice, I ignored it because I was just relieved that the woman I loved was safely sprawled on the floor, the couch to the right a perfect barrier between she and JR's weapon.**_

_**"Are you okay?" I asked although Marissa appeared unharmed despite the startled expression she wore.**_

_I nodded through my befuddlement as I sat up. Questions tripped over each as they raced inside my head. First and foremost why had Bianca pushed me and then inquired if I was all right? Hadn't she shoved me away on purpose? And what was that cacophonous sound? It reminded me of the sound a gun made once its trigger was pulled, but this was supposed to be a happy occasion. Who in attendance would bring a gun; much less fire it into a room full of people?_

_Multiple raised and distressed voices reached my ears, but the ones that garnered my attention stemmed from an entrance to the tunnels toward the right side of the room. My mouth fell open in shock when Ryan and Zach none too gently escorted a wriggling and irate JR from the tunnel, throwing him on the floor before Zach kicked him. Since the couch was in my way, I wasn't certain where that kick landed, yet I heard my ex-husband's pained groan. He started to kick him again, but Ryan said something that I couldn't hear and placed his free hand against Zach's chest to stop him._

_His other hand held a gun._

_JR not only neglected to leave town but he decided to show up at the party with a gun - a gun that he fired twice. The next question to hurry through my mind was where did those bullets strike? Switching my attention to Bianca, I immediately looked horrified as my last inquiry was plainly and terribly answered. God, please let this only be a nightmare. _

_"Bianca..." I murmured, eyes focused on the small hole in my love's upper chest. Crimson stains began to tarnish the dress it took her nearly half an hour to decide on wearing. Obviously, Bianca wasn't aware that she had been shot until she glanced to where my eyes were fixed. Our eyes briefly met before she collapsed, Brot who had been standing nearby able to catch and delicately guide her to the floor._

_**Having crawled toward me while shouting my name, I felt the soft tendrils of Marissa's hair caressing my face while I looked off toward the right where JR lay groaning. The both of us on different levels of agony, his icy blue connected with my dark brown, neither of us blinking during the few seconds we stared. My attention was drawn elsewhere when I heard a male voice calling out to me.**_

_**Zach. He stood before JR's prone form yet he was looking at me, a frown etched on his face. I noticed the anger settle on his features as he swiftly turned to JR and kicked him with such intensity that he flipped over. Grabbing the blond by the collar of his shirt, Zach balled his free hand into a tight fist and was about to strike when Ryan pulled him back. A glance in my direction and Ryan couldn't prevent himself from punching JR instead.**_

_**A warm palm on my cheek and I peered up toward hazel eyes that I could wordlessly gaze into for an hour without any boredom. Those eyes were filled with water. "Don't cry," I whispered, discovering that I could barely move my lips.**_

_"Okay." I tried to smile but I doubted that it registered. Someone, I didn't notice whom, thrust his suit jacket into my hands and I pressed it against Bianca's chest. I barely suppressed a string of curse words when Brot, who kneeled near her head with Natalia next to him gently pointed out that there might have been another wound in Bianca's stomach. Looking closer, I unfortunately noticed that he was correct as there was another hole with dark liquid saturating the area around it. Shrugging out of his jacket, Brot hurried around to add pressure to her stomach. _

_"Just hold on baby." I attempted another smile. "Good news is there are about thirty-seven doctors at this part. You'll be in great hands."_

_**I managed to at least weakly return the smile right before I looked over Marissa's shoulder. Sure enough David, Angie, Jake, Griffin and Frankie were trying to get to where I lay and of course David insisted on taking the lead, demanding that someone fetch him clean towels or better yet gauze pads if available. Several people ran out of the room in search of those items just as Frankie recalled that he carried a doctor's bag in the trunk of his car. David actually appeared pleased as the younger doctor sprinted from the room.**_

_**Kendall, on the verge of hysteria was also trying to come over but Cara and Greenlee held her back, each on either side of my upset sister. Greenlee was doing most of the talking, but it didn't appear that her best friend was paying her much attention. Meanwhile, fortunately for Mom Uncle Jack hadn't exited before the gunshots and therefore currently held the woman he had just been arguing with in a comforting embrace while her best gal pal Opal soothingly rubbed her back.**_

_**My eyes flickered to black hair when David leaned over me, gracing me with a reassuring smile before inspecting the wounds. Jamie returned with two terrycloth towels that he gave to David while an ashen Tad shakily pulled out his phone to call for an ambulance.**_

_**"No Martin," David retorted while replacing the jackets with the folded towels. Marissa resumed placing pressure on my chest wound and Brot the stomach wound. "In the time it'll take for the ambulance to get here we could cut out several minutes by driving. Plenty of cars here to choose from."**_

_**She and Cara having guided Kendall to a chair, Greenlee immediately volunteered. "My car is parked on the street making it quick and easy to leave. Back seat is empty and clean." She nervously licked her lips but other than that my petite cousin exuded confidence. "Let me drive. I'm not allergic to speed."**_

**No she is not, **_I thought as we sped through the thankfully uncrowded streets of Pine Valley despite it being a Friday night. Greenlee drove like a person involved in a car chase, David sat in the passenger seat rifling through Frankie's medical bag and Kendall who insisted on accompanying us was in the backseat with Bianca and I._

_Once Kendall and I scrambled into the car, Zach (who carried Bianca there) placed my thankfully still conscious partner atop us. I cradled her head while her sister sat with her legs resting across her lap. Designated David's unofficial nurse, Kendall's first task was to use a pair of scissors found in Frankie's bag to cut away the fabric around the bullet wound in Bianca's stomach. Also located in his bag was a significant amount of gauze, layers of which were now being firmly pressed into Bianca's stomach and chest. Kendall and I tried not to show our panic as the pristine gauze turned red, requiring us to add more._

_I also tried not to panic as her breathing was noticeably faster than it had been when Zach put her in the car and although it was dark, I saw that her skin, which was cool to the touch had turned pale. Bianca's eyes meeting mine, bluish lips trembled - no, perhaps she was about to say something. I wanted to ask her but the lump in my throat was too large. _

_**As I looked up at the woman who I loved so much that it often scared me, I had the urge to tell her. It occurred to me that although she was aware of it, to this day I never directly told her. Marissa knew it in her heart but I needed to verbally confirm. I confirmed with my sister, with my mother and even that jackass who shot me but I had failed to say those special words to the one person who should have heard them. Somehow I had to make my lips move just in case...**_

_**I wanted to live! Desperately wanted to live, but just in case this was my last night here, I needed Marissa to hear those words so there wouldn't be any doubt. Lyrics from that Garth Brooks song (I prefer the Joose version) 'If Tomorrow Never Comes' scrolled through my brain. "So tell that someone that you love / Just what you're thinking of / If tomorrow never comes." How apt those words were to my current situation. Wishing that my breathing wasn't so ragged, I focused on giving my declaration. **_

_**"Ma...rissa...I...luh...love...I love...you."**_

_**She emphatically shook her head. "Not now. Save that," her voice cracked, tears sliding down her face. **_

_**"Now. Have to...now. I love...you." My vision temporarily blurring, I couldn't tell if she continued to cry. "I love...you so...much Marissa. In love...with...you. You're...my greatest love." Blinking, I was able to view her, noticing that she indeed still quietly wept. **_

_"I love you too baby." I touched my lips to her damp forehead. "More than anything."_


	6. Chapter 6

**Howdy ya'll! Here is chapter six for you. I hope you don't mind the loooong flashbacks, but I really wanted to share these details with you. As always I thank you for your reviews. You're all awesome with capital A's.**

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_**Seconds after Greenlee made a sharp right that gave us all a hearty jolt, I started counting the passing street lamps. I could feel both Kendall and Marissa's eyes on me but I wouldn't look at them for fear that further tears would be shed. I was on my sixth street lamp when a sharp pain slammed into my chest. Not that it didn't hurt before, but now it felt as though an elephant decided to utilize me as its chair. I also found it difficult to breath and the more I tried the worse the chest pain became. Forgetting about the street lamps, I grasped the edge of the seat and shut my eyes. I didn't want to die and I especially didn't want to die like this. As if this evening wasn't horrible enough, now Marissa would have to observe as I passed away while in her arms. I would only be at peace with that happening if we were well into our golden years and preferably tucked into a warm and cozy bed.**_

_Our voices filled with the utmost alarm, Kendall and I near simultaneously called out to David. Twisting around in his seat, he glanced between us before Bianca's compromised breathing demanded his attention. He muttered something that sounded like an expletive. "Bianca talk to me if you can. Is it harder to breathe?"_

_My partner nodded and then moved even bluer lips to speak. "And chest. Hurts. A lot."_

_Pulling a stethoscope from the medical bag, David inserted the ear tips and turned around so that his knees were on the passenger seat. Positioning his body within the space between his and Greenlee's seats the best he could, he was able to reach Bianca with the chestpiece and proceeded to listen. I believe my heart temporarily stopped in response to his grave expression. _

_"Tension pneumothorax."_

_"What's the layman's term for that David?" Greenlee inquired, beating us to the punch. Her focused eyes remained on the road as she waited for his answer. _

_"A collapsed lung," he replied, looping the stethoscope around his neck. His dark eyes looked to his unofficial nurse. "I'm unable to detect any breath sounds on her left side, so I'm going to instruct you on how to perform a thoracostomy. Fortunately, Frankie has what we'll need." Still on his knees, he reached back for the medical bag while still talking hurriedly yet clearly. "What's happened is that air has escaped from her lung and is filling up the area around it and therefore crushing it. We need to relieve the pressure so that her breathing will improve. Once we reach the hospital I'll have to insert a chest tube, but for now this will do." 'This' was a long needle encased in sterile packaging. I'm not certain whose eyes resembled saucers more between Kendall and I. Before either of us could offer a response, David told Kendall to kneel on the seat facing her sister so that she would be in an optimal position for the procedure. While she complied, he snipped the index finger from a latex glove and then removed the needle from its packaging. _

_I nuzzled Bianca's temple in what deep down I realized was a futile attempt to soothe her as my eyes remained on David's preparations. He inserted what he referred to as a catheter needle into the latex finger and then handed Kendall who was now in the correct position a pair of unaltered gloves which she slipped on. The two sisters gazed toward each other with expressions I couldn't decipher as Kendall waited for further instructions. The catheter needle in his left hand and a small package that read 'betadine swabstick' in his right, David adopted a calm voice when he informed Kendall on what she would have to do. Her eyes imitated saucers again. _

_"What? You want me to put that needle where?"_

_"Her chest. You can do this Kendall. You __**have **__to do this. I would but it's too awkward because I'm not close enough. I'll talk you through it. Now place your fingers on her left collarbone."_

_"Okay." Although she didn't sound convinced, she did as he said. _

_"Now you need to locate the midclavicular line, which is the midpoint of the clavicle or collarbone. Slowly move your fingers toward the left until I tell you to stop." Two seconds later Kendall had reached her destination. "That's the beginning of the midclavicular line and it extends downward along her trunk. Try to imagine a line there and I want you to move your fingers downward just a bit and search for the area between her second and third rib. This is referred to as the 2nd intracostal space and is where you'll insert the catheter. The first rib is hidden behind her clavicle, so the first rib you'll feel upon your downward palpitations is the second. Continue along the midclavicular line and you'll come to the third rib. You want to find the soft spot between it and the second rib. Use your fingertips and palpitate until you're sure you've found it."_

_Her brow knit in concentration, Kendall carefully moved gloved fingers along a straight path. Finally stopping, she kept her middle finger in place as she looked toward David. "I think I found it, but David what if I'm wrong? What if I nick her heart or something?"_

_"You stay in that area and you won't. You can do this. You feel solid areas directly below and above where your middle finger is?" She nodded, dark curls bouncing around her head. "That's your sweet spot. I have in faith in you and I think I can speak for everyone else in this car when saying that they believe in you too." Greenlee and I immediately spoke up agreeing with him and bless her heart, Bianca managed a brief nod. "Now open this and apply it to cleanse the area."_

_**I could practically see the renewed confidence flowing through her as my sister grabbed the package and tore it open. A swabstick in hand, she rubbed the rust-colored antiseptic in the general area the needle would go. Given the catheter needle, she relocated the 'sweet spot' and once she had her middle finger back on it, she glanced to David. **_

_**"Hold the catheter at a ninety degree angle and then insert it just above the third rib. You'll detect a hissing sound once in the pleural cavity. That's good - that's the escaped air being vacuumed so to speak into your needle."**_

_**"How far in do I go?"**_

_**"Until there's a hissing sound or rush of air, which will take the majority of the needle. Keep it perpendicular and stop when you hear the hiss."**_

_**Kendall's eyes widened. "This needle has to be at least two inches long."**_

_**"Two inches and a quarter. You need it long in order to puncture deep enough."**_

_**She nodded. "Right. Okay." When her eyes trailed to my face I produced the vigor to wink at her, causing my sister to respond with an albeit tremulous, brief smile. With a deep breath, Kendall placed the needle against my chest. The moment it broke through my skin I looked up toward the dome light that David switched on before preparing the catheter needle. Although I felt it, the fact that my breathing was impaired kept me distracted from most of the discomfort the progressing catheter generated. **_

_**I still loved Marissa but about ten seconds later that catheter was my new best friend. I wanted to ask it to marry me and slip an engagement ring on its finger. That's if needles had hands. The elephant packed up and left and the pain receded as I too heard the air rushing from the needle. It was then that I obtained extra vigor to give my sister a thumbs up to assure her that she had succeeded. A longer lasting smile curved the corners of her mouth while relieved tears sprang to her eyes. I glanced toward Marissa to find that her eyes were also watery as she split a smile between the both of us. **_

_**"Good job Kendall," David said, also smiling a bit. "Now for the next steps. You've done the most difficult part, so this will be a cakewalk in comparison." **_

_**Nodding, Kendall listened and did as he said. She threaded the catheter off until its hub with the gloved finger attached was against my skin. She then withdrew the needle and used strips of medical tape David offered to secure the hub and the gloved finger, which the doctor referred to as a makeshift flutter valve. Kendall was instructed to watch the homemade valve to ascertain that I breathed correctly. If the piece of glove flared upon exhalation and collapsed upon inhalation then it was working and preventing air from building up around my lung again. So far so good. Thank God because I didn't want Marissa to have to watch me slip away.**_

_"So her lung is all better now?" Kendall inquired, looking hopeful. I held my breath as I awaited his response. _

_"It's an important yet temporary fix. A chest tube will further help her lung and depending on the severity of damage she may need surgery. We'll have to run tests, but I'm guessing one of the bullets fractured a rib, which then could have pierced her lung and that's how the air was able to leak into the plural cavity." Putting the stethoscope back on, David leaned between the seats to check Bianca's chest. Nodding, he scooted both of his knees back on the passenger seat. "So far so-"_

_"Damn it!" All of us looked to Greenlee who had a death grip on the steering wheel as she was forced to stop behind a truck at a railroad crossing. A freight train was approaching. A very slow freight train. Damn it was right. Greenlee shook her head as she glanced toward the rearview mirror spotting the cars that had gathered behind us waiting for the train to pass. Although none of us actually verbalized it, I'm sure we had the same thought. We couldn't afford to wait. _

_"Are we being cosmically punked?" Greenlee murmured, drumming her fingers on the wheel. Determination flooded her features. "Kendall, David sit down. We're outta here." She didn't have to ask them twice. Like obedient children they planted their bottoms in their respective seats and David even reached for his seatbelt. Making a U-turn into the lane going in the opposite direction, she again proved that she wasn't allergic to speed as she pressed on the gas. Turning right on the next available street, which happened to be a residential neighborhood, we traveled in the same direction that the freight train was headed. _

_"You have a plan?" David asked as Greenlee passed a stop sign without heeding it._

_"Yep. Beat the damn train to the next railroad crossing. It's going slow so we should be fine." _

_"Sounds uncomplicated." He briefly paused. "Hey Greenlee?"_

_"Yes David?"_

_"Try not to terminate us."_

_She looked away from the road long enough to send him a smirk. "I'll do my best."_

_One dip in the road, two potholes, two more ignored stop signs and several honks to hurry a medium-sized critter across the street later, and we were headed in our original direction. As we approached another railroad crossing we discovered good news and bad news. The good news was there weren't any vehicles ahead of us leaving the road clear for Greenlee to smoothly speed. The bad news was that the recently sluggish freight train obviously procured a burst of energy because it was rapidly nearing the railroad crossing, the reflective crossing gates already lowered. She could have been on to something. Perhaps we __**were**__ being cosmically punked. _

_A couple of words falling from her lips that couldn't be uttered on basic television stations, our driver glared at the oncoming train. She begrudgingly pushed her foot against the brake while stating, "I'll keep going if you guys are on board. I can do it."_

_"I'm on board," I answered first. _

_"Me too," Kendall responded immediately after. _

_"Go for it," David said while checking that his seatbelt was secured. _

_"No. Don't risk it," Bianca spoke up in a quiet yet audible voice._

_Greenlee had already stepped on the accelerator when she replied to the last person to talk. "Sorry. You don't get a vote Selfless Sally. Just hang tight." Breaking her MPH traveled record for the evening, we hurried toward the railroad crossing with no intention of stopping. After closing my eyes and pressing my lips to my girlfriend's cheek, I felt Kendall's arm drape across my shoulders, her gloved hand rubbing my right shoulder blade. Such teamwork in this car. I thought of that motto all for one and one for all and sent a quick prayer that we five Musketeers daring to play our own version of chicken with a train would safely make it across the tracks._

_"You're going around the crossing arms right?" I heard David inquire. There was a great deal of apprehension in his tone. I hadn't realized that David Hayward could ever be apprehensive. _

_"No. Swerving would take too much time," Greenlee replied sounding strained yet resolute at the same time._

_They fell silent and all I could hear was breathing and the freight train blowing its horn as it drew closer. Tightening my already closed eyes as much as was possible, there was a bang that I assumed was the car hitting the crossing arms since we remained upright and alive. We then jerked about while driving over the tracks and finally the tires landed on smooth pavement. I'm not certain who breathed a sigh of relief first. As I opened my eyes I witnessed David leaning over to drop a noisy kiss on Greenlee's cheek and Kendall leaning forward to affectionately squeeze her shoulder. Those dimples were on display as the petite driver grinned. _

_"Greenlee I hereby rename you Speed Racer," I said, smiling at the woman seated diagonally to me. _

_Despite the tense situation we were in she and Kendall managed a light chuckle. "I like that," Kendall commented. _

_Looking down at Bianca who had her eyes closed, I let my mouth graze her cheek again. "Do you like the nickname Speed Racer for your courageous cousin there baby?" I waited about two seconds for those long dark lashes to flutter but they didn't. "Can you hear me? Bianca?" When I kissed her cheek again, this time near the corner of her mouth her eyes did open. I heard someone sigh loudly but since I only had eyes for her, I didn't know whom. "We're almost there, okay?"_

_Blinking, she stared at me for a moment. "Marissa. Did you just...kiss me?"_

_"Yeah." I softly smiled. "Unable to help it. You're addictive."_

_This time Bianca was the one to sigh. "I can't...do this anymore," she faintly admitted. _

_"Do what?"_

_"Us. You and me."_

_"What about the two of us?" Wait. Something about this conversation felt oddly familiar. The resort. On the bed. Bianca was fidgety and at first I was obnoxiously clueless. I mean I actually convinced myself that the reason she behaved so peculiar was because she didn't like the bracelet I gave her to wear for her meeting. Really Marissa? If I had my very own souped up DeLorean, I would go back in time just to smack myself upside the head._

_"Our friendship...means a lot...to me."_

_My mouth opened and closed without words. She went back to that day. The day she confessed to me how she felt. She skipped some of our dialogue, but this was definitely our conversation. "Bianca...me too."_

_"There's nothing I wanna do...to ruin it."_

_I quickly shook my head. "You couldn't." Feeling a lump about to form, I swallowed. "You couldn't ruin what we have." Remembering what she said just before admitting her attraction, I adjusted them for my own declaration. "You're great. You're amazing. My best friend right?" _

_Bianca nodded with a tiny smile in place. "Right."_

_I returned that smile even as tears stung my eyes. "But it's more than that. You're not only my best friend. You're the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, the woman I want to raise our children with, the woman I want to share so many experiences with and the woman I yearn to grow old with. There's nothing terrible about any of that right? And I don't mean to monopolize whatever it is you were about to say, but I just wanted you to know that I'm...in love with you. I am so very much in love with you Bianca Montgomery. When I'm with you I'm the happiest I've ever been and I had no idea anything could feel this incredible. You are a blessing and each day I thank God that you're in my life. I haven't a clue what I did to deserve you, but I'm ecstatic that you're here." Tears rolled down my face as I whispered, "Did I mention that I love you?"_

_Drops of salty liquid sliding from the corners of her eyes, Bianca appeared bewildered yet optimistic. "You love __**me**__?"_

_"More than anything."_

_Her eyes began to droop. "I love you too."_

**#####**

_**The last thing I remembered before this moment was David carrying me into the brightly lit hospital and shouting for a gurney while Marissa and Kendall trailed us in dresses that would probably be thrown away. I was now in the operating room where David along with other doctors who had now arrived from the party scurried about trying to save my life. Jake stood near my head and spoke to me but I couldn't understand him. Although he couldn't be much closer he might as well have been trying to communicate with me from a mile away. At least his comforting smile registered. **_

_**Speaking of smiles, I spotted Marissa standing on the other side of a window with Kendall and Zach to her right. Regardless of her tear stained cheeks, there was a tender smile on her lips as she pressed her palms against the window. Someone put an oxygen mask on my face but I just kept watching her. Oh, I loved her. I loved that woman and I could never tire of saying it. Loving Marissa Tasker made me feel warm, tingly and serene. I would have announced it if it weren't for the oxygen mask concealing my mouth. Instead, I winked at her and I'm happy that I did because her smile bloomed. **_

_**It occurred to me that my breathing had significantly slowed, my heartbeat wasn't pounding in my ears and the pain had vanished. I'm not sure if any of the doctors had given me pain medication but I felt...light. **_

_**I didn't feel like a person who had recently taken two bullets to their torso. Actually, thinking about what JR had done, I didn't even feel angry anymore. **_

_**I felt on the verge of giddiness.**_

_**In fact, I felt as though I could jump off of that gurney, strut out to the hallway and pull Marissa into my embrace and kiss her like my life depended on it. **_

_**My life. I felt like it was slipping away.**_

_**I felt like I was dying.**_

**######**

_It happened so quickly. One moment my partner was looking toward me, she winked and then seconds later she slowly closed her eyes and then the machine she was attached to indicated that she was flatlining. _

_I wanted to remain calm. I told myself over and over again while Kendall and I raced from the car that I would keep a level head. Unfortunately, I was wrong because I lost it. I lost like I never have before as I began to slap my palms against the window and begged for David or anyone else in that room to save her. I discovered that I couldn't cry anymore but I screamed. _

_I screamed to the Heavens._

_I screamed at the doctors and nurses._

_I screamed at the person pulling me away from the window, the blinds of which were being shut. _

_But most of all I screamed for Bianca not to leave._


	7. Chapter 7

**Roses are red/Violets are blue/You reviewers are grrrreat!/No doubt about it, that's true. Okay, a poet I am not but you all are 200% grrrreat ;-) Now about this chapter. I didn't plan for it to stand independently, but I decided I was putting too much into one chapter so I split it up. This means that chapter 8 is almost done so I should have that posted within a few days. Thanks again for the reviews that had me smiling a mile and a half wide.**

**##########**

_**My life. I felt like it was slipping away.**_

_**I felt like I was dying. **_

_**And as I lay there with my eyes shut, the insides of my eyelids were the mini television screens used to display the twenty-seven years I spent on this planet. The highs, the lows, the in-between's, the tears, the laughter, the losses and the loves. Some of the flashes I had completely forgotten, others were hazy because I hadn't thought about them in years while most I instantly recalled. Although they swiftly traveled across my mini screens I was able to pick out a few that were truly memorable to me.**_

_**The moment I fortunately decided to keep my baby after a last minute conversation with my sister. I was just about to go through with the abortion when I ran into Kendall at the clinic and after listening to her and observing her I knew, I just knew that I had to, wanted to keep my baby. Kendall hadn't intended to change my mind but unbeknownst to her at the time those words definitely had an impact. **_

_**Another moment that went along with the first was when Kendall discovered that I hadn't terminated my pregnancy. I wanted to keep it a secret but upon visiting me at my new apartment she found my baby book and sonogram. After I admitted that I was still pregnant we had what I deem to be among our top ten sisterly occasions. I believe that was when our bond truly began to take hold. **_

_**One of the most amazing moments was when I found out that Miranda was still alive. After spending the majority of 2004 trying to come to terms with her 'death', I awoke from a coma that December to have Mom introduce her to me. Best Christmas present ever. **_

_**Another favorite child related moment was when my youngest daughter Gabrielle was born. It was definitely memorable giving birth after a tornado had just struck Pine Valley. My babies certainly do know how to make natural disaster entrances - first a storm and then a tornado. I suppose I wasn't meant to try one of those epidurals.**_

_**Erica Kane. My Mom and also the woman you sometimes wanted to throttle yet couldn't help but to love and admire. God I was terrified when I learned that she vanished after leaving Pine Valley in a private plane. We've had so many disagreements and arguments and there were times that deep down I wished that she wasn't my mother, but I love that woman with all my heart. A powerhouse wrapped within a petite package. When she was missing I kept thinking that this world, my world wouldn't function properly without her. I've wanted to throttle her since her return but thank God she's still here. **_

_**My loves. The romantic kind I mean. In the car on the way to the hospital I informed Marissa that she was my greatest love (and she most definitely is) but the women who occupied my heart before her haven't been forgotten. From Sarah to Reese, all of them made an appearance in the multitude of flashes despite how our relationships may have ended. **_

_**Sarah. My first love and first lover. I flashed on the first time we made love. We were both virgins and didn't have much of a clue about what we were doing. We fumbled about and the experience put the 'A' in awkward and yet it was sweet and touching at the same time. **_

_**Lena. I considered her my first 'adult' love. What we shared was much more rocky than smooth, but I'll never forget her nor do I want to. The most memorable flash was when I hurried to the airport in the hopes that I could encourage her not to leave. I talked and I plead and just as I was about to capitulate I was able to change her mind. And then she kissed me. Good gracious, I was flying higher than those airplanes during and after that kiss.**_

_**Maggie. Before Marissa I honestly didn't believe that I could love anyone with as much depth as Maggie Stone. It took us about two centuries to get together and during my flashes I recalled a very special day. With Miranda I was about to start anew in Paris and then Maggie showed up on our plane. She had already told me that she wouldn't be joining us, yet at the last minute there she was. I was flying higher than the moon and the stars when she asked if we had room for one more.**_

_**Reese. Sure the first time we wed our marriage lasted all of three minutes, but I must admit she presented me with one beautiful incredible proposal. A ring, a newly built home and a speech that caused my heart to do somersaults. We endured a significant share of ups and downs and although I'm no longer in love with Reese, I'll always have love for her. Plus without her (and Zach) I wouldn't have my precious Gabby. **_

_**Marissa. I figured that I couldn't love any woman more than Maggie, but that spirited redhead proved me wrong. I've never been more delighted to be wrong about something. I just wish that we had more time together but I cherish the moments that we did share. Difficult to select a favorite, but amongst them was when she declared her love for me and in front of her ex-husband no less. Okay, that also put the 'A' in awkward, yet I was beaming within. When I awoke that morning I didn't have a clue that in the late afternoon I would learn the woman I loved and adored would return my feelings. She may have run at first, but when she stopped running that woman was a-ma-zing!**_

_**Marissa was the last person I saw seconds before my eyes grew too heavy and my heart ceased to beat. Then there were the flashes followed by the most brilliant flash of light. A soft gasp escaped from my lips when I noticed that I was standing on what appeared to be an isolated beach. Before me was an azure ocean, waves gently crashing onto an extensive stretch of soft white sand. Looking over my shoulders, I spotted throngs of palm trees and random pieces of driftwood. Looking down at myself, I noticed that I was wearing the same outfit I had on during the family get together at Kendall's house earlier in the day, except I was barefoot. Wiggling my toes in the sand, I sifted my fingers through loose locks and gazed out toward that perfect water below a perfectly cerulean sky. Although I felt at peace there were questions.**_

_**Was this...**_

_**Was I...**_

_**Catching movement out of the corner of my eye, I glanced toward the left and then did a double take. I'm surprised my jaw didn't collapse to the sand upon my seeing the half dozen people standing in the distance. Instead my eyes began to blur with joyous tears as my mouth curved into a grand smile. There stood six more of my loves, one of them briefly romantic. **_

_**My grandmother Mona.**_

_**Travis, my Dad.**_

_**Frankie.**_

_**Leo.**_

_**Ethan.**_

_**Myrtle. **_

_**They didn't advance in my direction, but I could tell that they returned my smile. It had been far too long. My heart burst with the sudden need to touch them, throw my arms around them and litter their faces with kisses. Since none of them moved toward me, I had to go to them. Not being able to wait another second, I was about to break into a run when I heard a familiar voice utter my name. I slowly turned around and there she was wearing a faint smile. **_

_**"Babe?"**_

_**"In the flesh," she paused, chuckling a bit. "Or in the spirit."**_

_**"So it's official then? You're not apart of Project Orpheus?" More pertinent questions I probably should have asked, but that was the first to spring from my mouth. **_

_**Babe's mouth opened and shut several times before she responded with a vaguely humorous, "Nice to see you too." When I apologized, she shook her head. "No, it's fine sweetie. You have every right to be frazzled. Unsure of what's going on."**_

_**"What **__is __**going on? Am I dying? Have I already died? Are you here to escort me to the Hereafter?"**_

_**Again she seemed hesitant. "I'm sorry, I can't answer that first question. And you're on the brink, not yet and no I'm not."**_

_**"Are they?" I looked toward the left side of the beach again and noticed that those six beloved people had vanished. "They're gone," I stated, peering at the blonde. "Will they be coming back?"**_

_**She nodded. "If you truly want them to return. For now come sit with me." She walked closer to the shoreline and sat down with her legs stretched out in front of her. **_

_**Glancing toward that recently occupied area, I followed Babe and settled next to her. I positioned my legs so that I could easily fold my arms across my knees and for the next few seconds quietly watched her sift sand through her fingers. "You never answered my question."**_

_**"Which one?"**_

_**"The one concerning Project Orpheus." Best poker face ever ensued. I couldn't begin to figure out what she was thinking. "You weren't one of David's patients?"**_

_**Babe clucked her tongue. "I'm here for you sweetie. Not to discuss myself," she paused with a smile. "What's been happening with you Bianca? How's your love life? Your children? Other family?"**_

_**I didn't even realize at first that I had begun to beam. "It has been one busy summer. My love life is...as close to perfect as you can get. She makes me want to perform back flips and cartwheels and I would if I knew how. I...I've never felt happier with anyone else and it's only been two months and a bit of change. I'm unable to imagine life without her."**_

_**Babe's voice had grown soft when she replied, "I'm certain Marissa feels the same way."**_

_**"You know I've given it thought and I bet you two would have been terrific and adorable sisters. Give Kendall and I a run for our money." When she chuckled I smiled. **_

_**"Sounds like a fun competition." Done sifting, Babe used an index finger to draw in the sand. "How are your little ones?"**_

_**Somehow my beam intensified. "Thriving and around twenty-five shades of wonderful. I think Gabby might grow up to be an artist because she's been painting and drawing so much we have to rotate the pictures on the fridge and even have some in frames around the house. Perhaps I'm biased but they are gorgeous. Da Vinci would be so jealous!"**_

_**Babe broadly grinned. "Maybe in twenty or so years there will be a Gabrielle Montgomery art gallery opening. I can picture you and Marissa in attendance wearing such proud smiles at your daughter's latest accomplishment. Miranda?" Completing the shape of a heart, she started drawing within it. **_

_**"She's doing great. Just started the second grade and I can hardly believe it. Time passes by so quickly. Soon she'll be in high school, college..."**_

_**"Career, marriage, children." Her finger paused while she sent me a grin. "Children. You gonna take a page out of your mother's playbook or will you let the kids call you the 'G' word?" **_

_**"I'm totally cool with the 'G' word." I laughed and then it promptly faded when I thought of the future. I wasn't in the future. My relationship with Marissa wouldn't flourish. I won't be able to assist in decorating our new home with her any further. I can't someday ask her to marry me, perhaps have another child together, dedicate each and every day to sustaining her happiness and letting her know how much she's loved. I wouldn't attend Gabby's art gallery opening. I wouldn't see Miranda, AJ and Gabby graduate, began their careers, meet the person of their dreams and get married or have the opportunity to spoil my grandbabies. **_

_**"Today was the final chapter of my life," I murmured, glancing around for my departed family and friends. I suppose it was time to start a new book with them. Part of me actually looked forward to it while another part ached to continue the current novel. **_

_**"Was it?" **_

_**"It isn't?" **_

_**"Do you want it to be?" Babe stopped drawing and I sharply inhaled upon studying her creation. Marissa's initials and my own with a plus sign between them. It reminded me of the beginning of our relationship altering conversation in the park, when she brought up couples carving their initials into trees. Since then several times I thought about carving our initials in that tree just a few steps from where we shared our first kiss and then surprising her, but unfortunately I hadn't gotten around to it. **_

_**"Do I have a choice?" I asked as I continued to stare at her sand drawing. "Because earlier you mentioned that I wasn't dead...yet."**_

_**Placing two fingers underneath my chin, Babe nudged upward until our eyes met. "Technically that could be said to anyone who isn't brain dead. Anyone who is alive isn't dead...yet. Yet could mean you have fifty more years to go." Dropping her hand, she awaited my reply.**_

_**"Are you saying I have fifty more years?" **_

_**"Not a psychic sweetie. Just said that you hadn't passed on yet. Question is, are you going to join loved ones who've already passed or return to those who remain alive? Is September 23, 2011 your last day or does Bianca Montgomery have a future after all?" **_

_**"Babe?"**_

_**"Yeah?"**_

_**"Why are you here?"**_

_**"Already said I was here for you." Smiling, Babe turned so that she was facing me. "To help you."**_

_**"With?"**_

_**She shrugged. "Whatever you need. I'm here."**_

_**A scream put an end to our conversation. That scream caused my heart to shatter into a million pieces and a shiver to travel along my spine. A soft warm breeze abruptly sped up causing the palm trees to sway, their fronds rustling while the ocean waves appeared to double in size before violently crashing. When the screaming continued I stood up and frantically looked around for the person responsible for them. Unsuccessful, I turned to Babe with an imploring expression. **_

_**"You'll help me right? So where is she? Please help me find Marissa." **_

_**Standing, Babe dusted the seat of her pants as her eyes focused somewhere over my shoulder. "What about them?" **_

_**Them were the half dozen I loved so much, yet now it was clear to me that I couldn't go to them if given the choice and obviously somehow I had a choice. Despite my love for them I wasn't ready to join them yet. I wanted to live. I wanted a future and I wanted Marissa, our children, Mom, Kendall, Zach, Uncle Jack, my nephews, Greenlee, Ryan among others to be apart of it. Tears dampening my cheeks, I blew them a kiss and again noticed their responding smiles, which appeared brighter and perhaps relieved as if they agreed with my decision. As they started to fade, I looked back at Babe who also seemed relieved. **_

_**"Let's go then." When she raised her arm and offered her hand I didn't hesitate to grasp it. **_


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey ya'll! Thank you for the reviews of the last chapter. Disclaimer for this one: There's a particular character who probably needs a bar of soap introduced to their mouth ;) This is my longest chapter to date and I hope you all approve. Thanks again!**

**##########**

_Beginning to awaken, a tiny smile curved my lips when I felt the warm body pressed against my own. Nuzzling my face into the crook of her neck, I deeply inhaled her scent. It was different. Pleasant yet noticeably different. When I whispered her name I felt her shift backward a bit before her palm touched my cheek. A thumb stroked back and forth as I pried my eyes open, blinking several times until I could clearly see her face. That face, although very pretty caused my heart to shatter into a million pieces because it didn't belong to Bianca. _

_"Kendall..."_

_"Hey sleepyhead," she softly replied, still stroking my cheek. "You okay?"_

_My brow furrowed as I thought about the question. Okay. Was I okay? I felt fuzzy and confused. Raising my head I took in our surroundings and promptly produced questions of my own. Why was I lying in a hospital bed with Kendall? Why were we wearing medical scrubs, hers purple and mine blue? And when did I decide to take a nap? I didn't remember walking in here for a rest. My eyes widened when the fuzziness started to lift. _

_Bianca gazing at me seconds before she flatlined. Me screaming like a person who had recently escaped from a rubber room in the psychiatric ward. Ryan pulling me away from the window and attempting to calm me down to no avail. Cara appearing with a syringe and despite my protests inserting it into my arm. Her big brown eyes sympathetic and glistening with tears watching me while the contents of that syringe took effect. Ryan's arms around my middle, my head lolling forward as darkness arrived to claim me. Whispering my partner's name a moment before I allowed it to._

_"Bianca." I sat up so quickly Kendall had to grab the mattress to prevent herself from falling backward onto the floor. "Bianca! She flatlined. Where is...how is she?" I didn't realize that Krystal was in the room until she hurried to my side, placing her hand on my back. _

_"Honey they brought her back and she's in surgery now."_

_"Really?"_

_Krystal slid her hand up and down my back as she smiled at me. "Yes, really. We were just given an update about ten minutes ago. It's going to be a while but she's hanging in there and has an excellent team working on her."_

_I briefly closed my eyes as I repeatedly thanked God mentally and verbally. Upon opening them, I leaned over to hug Kendall and then arose from the bed to pull my mother into a hug. A bit woozy, I sat down on the bed and Kendall walked around to sit next to me, placing an arm around my shoulders. _

_"How long was I asleep?" _

_Kendall checked the clock on the wall. "Almost an hour."_

_"I'm gonna go find Cara. She wanted to be informed when you woke up. Be right back." After kissing my forehead, Krystal left to find the doctor. _

_While she was away, Kendall filled me in on our outfits that could be saved to be worn as Halloween costumes next month. Once I was moved to this room, Krystal and Opal agreed that Kendall and I should change our clothes which were beyond repair. Opal assisted Kendall in washing up while Krystal took care of me as I lay in a dreamless sleep. Those dresses discarded, we were provided with brand new scrubs and now Kendall knelt on the floor with a pair of cute athletic shoes that happened to match my scrubs. They too looked new and I asked if someone went to a nearby department store to purchase them. Surprising me with a light chuckle, she unrolled a pair of socks. _

_"Not so new, but I doubt they've been worn." Kendall checked the soles and showed me that they were spotless. She started to slide the socks onto my feet, ignoring when I reached down for them. "Earlier this summer Greenlee and I made a pact that we were gonna start going to the gym at least three times a week, so we kept duffel bags with workout clothing and accessories in our cars. I'm finally wearing my sneakers and fortunately you and Greenlee have similar little feet so she donated hers."_

_That had me smiling. "So I take it the two of you have yet to make it to the gym?"_

_"You take it right my friend." Carefully slipping the shoes on, Kendall proceeded to tie their pristine white laces. "But I'm sure we'll get there someday." Looking up at me she winked and it immediately caused me to think about Bianca. She winked right before she..._

_"Kendall?" _

_"Mmhmm?"_

_"How are __**you**__ doing? I needed to be tranquilized while you've been so strong. So how are you and what can I do for you?" _

_Done with dressing my feet, Kendall reclaimed the spot next to me and again wrapped an arm around me. "Believe it or not, but you have been helping me." My dubious expression prompted her to explain. "Helping you, watching out for you has been a much needed distraction. I'm not usually the calm one in situations like this. And as for your being sedated, you witnessed the person you love being shot and later beginning to slip away right in front of you. Out of all the people gathered in that waiting area, I guarantee you the majority of them would have required a sedative if in your shoes." She brushed her lips against my temple. "You are strong Marissa so you need to give yourself more credit. Okay?"_

_A faint smile in place, I nodded. "I'll do better."_

_"That's what I like to hear."_

**#####**

_It was as if the Chandler party had moved to the hospital, although excluding Scott there weren't any Chandlers around and we had coffee instead of champagne. Some were quietly talking, some read magazines left on the table in the waiting room, a few fiddled with various electronic devices while others merely sat or walked around. Asked to donate blood, most of us sported bandages and a few people were still in the laboratory such as Erica and Jack._

_Two hours and eighteen minutes. That was how long Bianca had now been in surgery. Not too long ago we were given another update but there wasn't much new information to report. The good news was that she remained stable while the doctors steadily worked on repairing the damage caused by JR's gun. No, caused by JR. Afraid that I would crush it due to thoughts of him, I leaned over and placed my half full coffee cup on the floor next to the glazed donut I had managed to take two bites from. After family members and friends were asked to donate, Randi and Madison found an all night bakery and returned with two large pink boxes filled with a variety of pastries to maintain blood sugar levels. I promised Randi that I would eat a donut so I hoped she didn't notice that I hadn't finished it. _

_"What's your donut doing on the floor instead of your tummy?" _

_I looked toward my left and instead of Randi, it was Scott seated there. "I ate as much as I could. I'm not dizzy or anything so it's not necessary that I finish it."_

_I was glad he didn't push. "You hanging in there kiddo?"_

_"Trying to stay positive." Grabbing my cup I took a couple sips. _

_"She'll make it through this. She's tough."_

_After swallowing, I smiled. "Yes, she will. She's a Kane so that's a given. Just the sound of that surname is tough."_

_Kendall occupied the seat to my right. "I heard that comment," she started, a smile playing on her lips. "Your cool points just doubled Marissa. No wonder you're my favorite out of all my sister's past love interests." _

_"Um, thank you very much McBadAss." Feeling a blush creeping to my face, I reached down for the donut to throw it in the trash and rose from my plastic chair. Before I could make my getaway, Kendall grasped my forearm and looked up quizzically._

_"McBadAss?" _

_"You ever watch Grey's Anatomy?" _

_"I've caught an episode here and there. Why?"_

_"Some of the doctors on that show have nicknames that begin with 'Mc'. So I'm calling you McBadAss because that thora...thing you performed earlier on your sister in a speeding vehicle was truly bad-assed. It takes a heaping amount of courage to put a two inch needle in a person's chest when you don't have any medical training and what makes you even more of a bad ass is that you did it correctly." I briefly smiled. "The patient herself offered you a thumbs up. So Kendall you're McBadAss. Unless you have a problem with that."_

_She grinned as did Scott who had been raptly listening. "No problem with it at all. I'm McBadAss, Greenlee is Speed Racer. Who are you? You need a nickname too." Kendall tapped her fingertips against her chin while she thought._

_"You ponder on that while I'm gone. Be back soon." I'd taken one step when she asked where I was headed. Leaning down, I whispered near her ear, "I drank three and a half cups of coffee so..."_

_"Ah." The curly-haired bad ass chuckled. "Gotcha."_

_"Then I'm gonna take a walk around to stretch my legs, so I'll be back in a little bit okay?"_

_"Want some company?" Kendall and Scott simultaneously inquired. Looking at one another they laughed. _

_Smiling at them I replied, "Thank you both, but I'm good."_

_**#####**_

_With an empty bladder I began my walk, randomly choosing a hallway to meander through while I thought mostly about my partner and the children. We should have arrived home from the party by now and although the sitter was more than willing to stay overnight after hearing about what happened, Opal insisted that she would go, Amanda volunteering to join her once she picked her son Trevor up from his babysitter. Hopefully they would sleep through the night and in the morning..._

_Loudly sighing, I turned another corner. In the morning I hope and prayed that we would have good news for them. How would I explain to them that their mother had been injured on purpose? How would I explain to AJ that his own father was responsible? That young boy had already been through so much in his seven years and now this. My temples began aching as a clear image of my ex-husband entered my mind. "Damn you JR." I rounded another corner and as if just muttering his name had summoned him, there he was standing near a nurse's station, flanked by two uniformed officers. What was he doing here instead of booked and behind bars? And was it just my imagination or was the son of a bitch not even wearing handcuffs?_

_While one of the officers carried a conversation with three members from the PVH medical staff, JR stared toward the floor. Rooted to the spot I stared at him until he must have felt my eyes on him because he raised his head, his icy blue orbs locating mine. It was then I noticed the busted and swollen bottom lip that he sported. Did they deem it important to bring him here just because Ryan sucker punched him? And then while he continued looking in my direction, it occurred to me that he was holding his right arm against his stomach. Perhaps those kicks Zach delivered caused some damage. Good. I didn't care how sadistic it sounded, I hoped he had at least one cracked rib. In fact, let that rib pierce his lung so that he had to struggle to breathe and see how __**he**__ liked it. After everything he had done and it still seemed as though he was receiving special treatment just because he was Adam Chandler's son. What would he have to do for his ass to be in a deadly serious amount of hot water? Blow up Pine Valley?_

_While we were embroiled in a staring contest, memories of Bianca during the last almost two and a half months we were together soared through my mind. _

_How mundane it sounds, but the first time I went grocery shopping with her I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I create a haphazard list, toss my items into the cart and try to check out as quickly as possible. Not Bianca Montgomery, no this woman was an artistic grocery shopper. I was in awe of her list which was neatly arranged in sections. Meats, beverages, breakfast items, household products etc. She perused every aisle in order and highlighted items as they landed in our cart. And she used coupons! Coupons which were of course neatly clipped and organized in their own leather wallet. We purchased close to one hundred and fifty dollars worth of groceries and ended up paying $43.72._

_When we ran errands to began decorating our new home. At the hardware store alone it took us the better part of an hour to decide on what color to paint our bedroom and adjoining bath. I preferred a light color while she thought darker would be better. We 'argued' until we finally made a compromise and I enjoyed every second of it. _

_When we selected a bed, immediately agreeing that king-sized was best. Although we usually end up snuggling toward the middle, it's great having all that extra space. Plus, when the kids visit we're not packed in like sardines._

_The first time we 'broke in' our new king-sized bed. The extra space definitely comes in handy during certain adult activities._

_The first time during the middle of the night we snuck out of the house to the backyard, giggling like a couple of teenagers up to no good and partook of the Jacuzzi sans our clothing. Certain adult activities ensued there. What a fun night that was. _

_The day we took the kids to the park and had an amazing picnic on a perfect summer day. It was then I learned of Bianca's skills when we all played Hide-and-Seek. It would have been easier to locate a needle within a haystack!_

_The night at 11:32 we both had a craving for rocky road ice cream and she volunteered to go retrieve a pint from the freezer. She was gone long enough that I decided to investigate and moments later discovered that she had been holding out on me. On her way back she heard AJ crying because of a bad dream and to soothe him she took a seat on his car shaped bed and serenaded him. I didn't recognize the song but it was beautiful and my partner's voice was even more beautiful. _

_It only took seconds for those random memories to replay as I kept eye contact with him and by the time the image of Bianca softly singing while she rubbed AJ's back arose JR blinked, looked at me for another second and then returned to staring downward. There was something in his eyes just before he turned away and I could have sworn that it was guilt. However, even if I were certain that he was riddled with guilt I wouldn't care. Those were just a few of my memories of Bianca and earlier tonight he attempted to prevent future memories. He wanted to destroy them, destroy us, destroy the new family we were building and I hated him for that. I hated him more than I'd ever hated anyone or anything and although these feelings welling within terrified me, I balled my hands - the fingernails of which remained stained with her blood - into fists as my body trembled. _

_I didn't have any recollection of advancing, but next thing I knew I was nearly at the nurse's station and the instant I did realize it I just kept running. I was unaware if the officers or staff members had noticed my presence because I only had eyes for my ex-husband, who glanced up right before my palms pushed against his chest with such force that he stumbled backward. A thudding sound resulting when the back of his head struck the floor, I pounced, my knees landing on his stomach. Hands already formed into fists, I used his head as a punching bag, not stopping even when I heard the crunching and saw the redness beginning to coat his skin. Voices that sounded muffled to my ears yelled as hands tried to tug at my arms but I refused to budge or let up. _

_The knuckles of my left hand were able to connect with his chin as a pair of strong arms wrapped around my middle. As if I weighed about as much as a bag of cotton, they easily pulled me off of the groaning blond. However, before too much distance was put between us, I managed to place a kick to the apex of his thighs, effectively contacting junior JR. My feet hovered above the floor as I was carried backward and I still had eyes only for him. I wasn't done with him yet. If I could no longer physically attack him then verbally would have to do. _

_"You psychotic, manipulative, evil piece of shit! Anyone who has ever despised you, couldn't possibly have hated you as much as I do right now. You'd be wise to watch your back because I don't trust myself not to come after you again." Hot tears trailed down my face as I wriggled in those arms. "And if she dies I will personally deliver a one way ticket with the destination Hell to your ass! And that is not an empty threat JR. I will fucking finish you! Remember when you mentioned wanting to break Bianca? Well I look at you and although I don't see much of a man I wouldn't have any problem whatsoever breaking you!"_

_I didn't get an opportunity to say anything else because Kendall had appeared and took me into her arms. "Looking at his face I think you already sorta did hon," she whispered while moving a hand that was meant to calm me down along my back. That response may have been amusing if this weren't such an intense scene. Looking over her shoulder, I watched as a couple nurses knelt down to tend to JR's freshest injuries. He appeared as though he truly had a reason to be admitted to the hospital now. _

_"You're shaking," Kendall said as she pulled back to view my tear streaked face. "Let's get you back to our area." She glanced down toward him again. "The air is toxic around here."_

_**#####**_

_Before we could return to what Kendall referred to as our area, Zach (the person who interrupted my assault) observed the condition of my hands. It wasn't until he brought attention to them that it occurred to me that I could barely move my right hand and as the adrenaline decreased the pain elevated. Insisting on going with me, Kendall and I waited behind a curtain in one of the ER rooms for a doctor to come check me out. I had already been informed that I would probably require x-rays. Given ice packs, Kendall helped me by holding them against my hands, which were beginning to swell. _

_Occupying a chair next to my gurney, Kendall looked up at me, an unexpected twinkle in her eyes. "Can't let you out of my sight for a minute can I?" _

_Despite my throbbing hands, I lightly chuckled. "I'm sorry. I think I must be losing my mind."_

_"Pardon my bluntness but your ex-husband made an attempt on your life a mere few hours ago. You're allowed to lose it a bit."_

_"What I did to JR was more than a bit," I quietly replied. _

_Light eyes hardening, Kendall shook her head. "He deserved every blow."_

_"I agree!" We both looked toward the curtain as it was pushed back enough to reveal Greenlee. She winced while gazing at my hands. "Heard about what happened Rocky. How did a potty break and a casual walk turn into you prying open a can of whoop ass?"_

_Another chuckle erupted from my throat as well as Kendall's. "Didn't plan it. Just happened. Saw him and I snapped." I glanced over her shoulder. "Actually I'm surprised I haven't been arrested yet. I'd expect Adam to be demanding that cuffs be applied to my wrists as soon as possible."_

_"Hell no," Kendall swiftly responded. "We won't allow that to happen."_

_"Again, I agree!" Grabbing the remaining chair in the room, Greenlee placed it next to her best friend and sat down. "Kendall and I along with a roomful of people will have your back like a bra strap."_

_An eyebrow raised, Kendall seemed amused. "Practicing your comedy routine Speed Racer?"_

_Greenlee raised an eyebrow back at her. "Maybe I am McDumbAss."_

_The other woman smirked. "It's McBadAss you garden gnome."_

_I tried to contain it, but the snicker escaped anyway. Interrupting their ribbing, both women looked up at me. Greenlee was the first to speak. "What's activated your funny bone Rocky?"_

_"The two of you practicing your dual comedy routine."_

_"Well we aim to entertain." She smiled and I returned it. _

_"Rocky as in Balboa?" Kendall asked while carefully readjusting the ice packs. _

_"No, as in Bullwinkle's little buddy."_

_"I'd smack you but my hands are otherwise engaged."_

_"And you call yourself McBadAss. If you really lived up to that nickname you would figure out a way to smack me regardless."_

_Not genuinely irritated with her friend, Kendall laughed. "Anyway, I think it fits our feisty pal here perfectly." She peered up at me. "Do you like Rocky as your nickname?"_

_"I do. Thank you Greenlee."_

_Those deep dimples on display, she winked. "You're welcome. Kendall it's only fair that you get to choose your sister's nickname. Marissa created both of ours and I hers. Bianca should have one too." _

_Before she could utter a reply, the doctor entered. Kendall and Greenlee pushed their chairs out of the way so Dr. Patton could easily get to me and after a brief examination he surmised that I most likely had what was called a Boxer's fracture in my right hand, meaning that the neck of the metacarpal bone in my pinky finger was broken. I did notice that finger was the stiffest. As for my left hand, he guessed that it was just a sprain but to be certain he ordered x-rays for both hands. As we waited for the technician, Krystal stopped in for a visit, sitting next to me on the gurney. _

_Her arm wrapped around me, she kissed my cheek. "It's on Tweeter that you-_

_"Twitter," Greenlee corrected her._

_"Right Twitter. It's posted on there that you kicked JR's butt good. Good for you honey 'cause there were times when I wished that your sister would've done somethin' similar. I just hate you had to hurt yourself in the process."_

_"He must have one hard head," Kendall commented. She retrieved her smartphone from a pocket in her scrubs and began manipulating its screen. Not much time had passed when she smirked. "A hard head to go along with his broken nose, re-busted lip, a couple black eyes and a possible zygomatic complex fracture. That hasn't been confirmed yet because imaging is needed. Oh, and two teeth knocked out, one of them a molar." When she glanced up, I noticed the twinkling had resurfaced. "He should put those underneath his hospital pillow tonight and perhaps the Tooth Fairy will pay him a visit."_

_"What's a zygomatic complex fracture?" I asked while it sank in what I had done to my ex-husband. I felt a mixture of shame and pride._

_Kendall moved her thumb across the screen, her eyes shifting from left to right and back again while she read. "Cara tweeted the easily recognizable term. He may have a fractured cheekbone."_

_Emitting a whistle, Greenlee crossed one leg over the other. "Rocky remind me not to ever mess with you. You're a bad ass!" Krystal laughed and Kendall cleared her throat. "Not to be confused with your being McBadAss of course."_

_"Thank you." She slipped her phone back into her pocket. "Captain Kevlar."_

_"Hmm?"_

_Softly smiling, Kendall regarded all of us. "For our Binx. Much like a Kevlar bulletproof vest she provided protection and she's tough, reliable and strong. Also I like the alliteration of Captain Kevlar."_

_"That is the best nickname," I stated, my eyes suddenly filled with water. _

_"I so love it." Greenlee clapped her hands. _

_Krystal nodded. "Not sure what ya'll are talkin' about with the names, but I second that."_

**#####**

_Sure enough I had a Boxer's fracture in my right hand and a sprain in my left. The good news was that surgery wouldn't be necessary for the fracture and the sprain was mild. After numbing my hand with lidocaine, Dr. Patton realigned the broken bone and then created a splint that covered the majority of my forearm and hand along with the fourth and fifth fingers. My left hand was wrapped in ACE bandaging, which I should be able to remove in about four days whereas the splint would be with me a minimum of four weeks. _

_Arriving at the hospital chapel, I was relieved to see the swinging doors, which would make it so much easier to enter. Using my arm, I pushed the door open and entered the uninhabited small chapel. Deciding to kneel instead of sitting in a pew, I walked up to the altar and knelt. With a deep breath I closed my eyes. _

_"I know You don't make deals. A person says they'll do something for You in exchange for You blessing them with whatever it is they're praying for. So I'm not going to promise anything in exchange for her living, except to reiterate that not only will I love her, but I'll do so a little more with each day that passes. Please God, please don't call Bianca home to You just yet. I personally believe that she's one of Your best creations, an angel on earth and we need her here at least seventy more years. So many people depend on her...her babies most of all need her. Miranda and Gabby are so young. Regardless, they will be well cared for and loved but she is the best, most amazing mother. There's no one like her because how many people have the ability to brighten the lives of just about everyone they come in contact with? She's a blessing, the greatest gift and the sweetest kindest most giving person I've ever met. Tonight is a prime example. She risked her life to save mine and I sincerely wish she hadn't, but it makes me love her even more. She's a Kane and a Montgomery so she already has ample amounts of strength and perseverance but at the risk of sounding greedy, could You provide her with extra? I pray that she comes through this surgery and that it will be a success and she has a full recovery. We need the brilliant light that she has so please help her to keep shining for many years to come."_

_Opening my eyes, I gazed toward a nearby flickering candle until I heard my name being whispered. Startled, I jumped a bit and then looked over my shoulder, discovering Erica seated in the pew closest to the altar. Apologizing for startling me, she patted the empty space to her left. Rising, I inched in her direction yet at the last second chose to kneel in front of her instead of sitting beside her. She started to speak and I quickly opened my mouth, desperately wanting to talk first. _

_"I swear to you I wish that it was me on that table. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry this happened," my voice cracked, but I swallowed and willed myself to keep going. "If I could change places with her, I would in a heartbeat. Bianca means so very much to me, I love her more than I ever deemed possible and I'm sorry because I screwed up. It's my fault that this happened. It should have been me and I honestly wish to God that it was me. I should have handled this better, it shouldn't have gotten to the point that JR thought it reasonable to come after us with a gun. I can't apologize enough to you and I realize they're just words and it won't change anything but I am very very sorry," again my voice cracked and I found myself unable to prevent the dam from bursting. Out of words I hung my head while my shoulders shook with the force of my cries and I was surprised when Erica Kane lowered to the floor on her knees and embraced me, her chin resting on the top of my head. _

_"Marissa please stop berating yourself," she said, patting my back. "This is not your fault. The only one to blame is JR. You didn't force him to take one of Adam's guns and hide in the tunnels for a sneak attack. You couldn't have seen this coming, it's not your fault." _

_Raising my head, I looked at her face noticing her dampened cheeks. "But I had a restraining order and yet I didn't enforce it. We saw him twice today. First at Krystal's where he tried to intimidate us and then he showed up at Kendall's house. I should have called the police then. It keeps running through my mind that if I'd called the police they could have arrested him and then he would have been behind bars instead of at the Chandler party. What's the point of a restraining order if you don't use it? If I had we wouldn't be kneeling on this floor in this chapel so you see it is all my fault." Although it had begun to throb, I thumped my hand against my chest. "JR pulled the trigger but I inadvertently helped him do it."_

_A warm palm cupped my cheek. "You need to stop this Marissa. You'll drive yourself mad with all of these what ifs. You are not responsible for the choices that he made. As for the restraining order you tried to give him a chance to just leave and if I remember correctly you weren't the only adult there who could have contacted the police. So if it's your fault, it's mine, Zach's, Kendall's, Ryan's, Greenlee's and even Bianca's because not one of us thought it important enough to call the police. We had no way of knowing that his thoughts were so dark and twisted. I've known him a lot longer than you have and I didn't expect it. Is this my fault at all?" I quickly shook my head no. "Well it's not yours either. This guilt you're carrying...you need to try to release it. I need you to think positively, to focus on Bianca who we both love so much recovering. That's where your thoughts should be, on her. Please don't blame yourself." _

_A ragged breath released, I nodded. "Okay. Thank you."_

_"Thank __**you**__."_

_I cocked my head to the side while appearing quizzical. "What for?"_

_"Loving my daughter so much."_

**#####**

_It was almost two o'clock in the morning by the time Bianca's surgery was completed. Once she was taken to the PACU, also known as the Recovery Room, Erica asked to see her although visitors usually weren't allowed in that unit. Appearing more tired than I'd ever seen him, David didn't argue against it. In fact, he said that Kendall and I could go with her as long as none of us stayed more than ten minutes. He prepared us for how fragile she would look and despite mentioning that she was in critical condition he seemed hopeful that she would eventually recover. _

_Entering the large room where Bianca was currently the only post-op patient, we saw her bundled in warm blankets, a navy blue knit cap covering her head. Machines and an IV pole flanked her and because she was having difficulty breathing she was attached to a ventilator. I promised myself that I wouldn't cry yet I could feel the tears stinging my eyes as I studied the tube inserted into her airway. I reminded myself that although it looked invasive, that tube was helping her to breathe, it was aiding her to get better so that she could soon breathe on her own._

_Kendall and Erica quietly spoke with her first and then it was my turn. Standing next to her bed, I leaned over and pressed my lips to her cheek, which felt so cool. My mouth nearly grazing her ear I whispered, "I wish it wouldn't have happened but I thank you for protecting me earlier. Thank you for loving me that much Captain Kevlar. I'll explain the nickname later. Now you need to wake up and get better so I can spend the rest of my life proving how much I love you in return and I do so much. I love you baby."_


	9. Chapter 9

**Someone help me! I think I have an addiction to flashbacks! (grin) Thank you for the reviews. You may find my responses to the latest ones on my profile page.**

**##########**

"No," she murmured, the anxiousness easily identifiable in just that one small word. "No, not again. Please baby not again." Beads of sweat collecting along her forehead, her head thrashed against the pillow while she repeated the words 'not again' until hazel eyes finally opened. Sitting up, she quickly looked toward the left side of the bed, a long sigh escaping from her lips. It was empty and cool to the touch as usual. "Bianca," she whispered, leaning over to press her nose into the unoccupied pillow. She deeply inhaled although she realized that the brunette's scent wouldn't be found there any more. Part of her resented this king-sized bed now because there was too much space so she immensely welcomed the kids when they visited.

With another sigh, Marissa pushed the covers back and stood up, taking a few seconds to stretch before she reached toward the nightstand where her cell phone rested. No missed calls and text messages and no imperative emails while she slept a fitful total of about four hours. As she moved toward the window and opened the blinds to view the quiet street, she deemed that she may have been able to sleep another hour if it wasn't for that last perspiration inducing dream. Oh, it had started out and the majority of it played out extraordinarily well, yet that ending...

Marissa shuddered despite the lack of chill in the bedroom. She never wanted to relive that night again. She glanced toward the bedside clock and noted that it was just about to be half past six in the morning. Knowing that she was done with sleeping, Marissa decided to go for a run regardless of it probably being no more than forty degrees outside. With cell phone in hand, (because these days she didn't allow it to stray more than a few feet away from her) Marissa selected jogging clothes and headed into the bathroom to fulfill essential upon awakening activities.

Ten minutes later, dressed in a pair of loose fit dark blue cotton pants and a red hooded pullover sweatshirt with a white t-shirt underneath, she emerged from the bathroom, immediately disappearing into the walk-in closet. With a pair of socks and athletic shoes in hand, Marissa sat on the unmade bed to put them on. She had just straightened up the bed and then arranged her hair into a basic ponytail when she felt the vibration against her thigh and heard the ringtone. Thrusting a hand into her pocket to grab her phone, it wasn't necessary to check the caller ID because she knew the personalized ringtones of certain callers by heart.

A soft smile curved her lips as she pressed the phone to her ear. "Good morning Mimo. What're you doing up already? You could be sleeping a good..." Marissa checked her watch. "A good forty more minutes before getting ready for school. You okay?"

"I'm fine," she paused and heavily sighed. Without needing to ask, Marissa could guess the thought roaming through the seven-year-old's mind. _I'm fine but I'd be much better if I had Mommy._ "Did I wake you up?"

"No sweetheart. I was just going out for a jog. How 'bout I run by there to holler atcha?" She was delighted to hear Miranda laugh.

"You could try but I dunno if you'll make it 'cause her apartment is six miles from our house."

"And you don't think I'm tough enough?"

"You're pretty tough Rizz but that's kinda far on foot and you haven't been jogging long. Wouldn't want you to hurt yourself."

"Aw, you're so thoughtful. So why are you awake sweet thing?"

"Do me a favor?"

"Anything." At the dresser, Marissa located her wallet and keys, placing both in one of the two deep pockets at the sides of her pants. She listened while Miranda explained that she had painted a picture to be taken to her mother, but she had forgotten to give it to Marissa before she and Gabrielle were picked up last night. When she woke up a few minutes ago it occurred to her and so she wanted to call the redhead to make sure that she would retrieve the painting prior to leaving for the hospital. "Will do Mimo. I'm walking to your room as we speak."

"'kay. You'll find it on my desk. It should be good and dry by now." She yawned and ever the polite little lady apologized for it. "I think I'll go try to get," she paused and Marissa knew that she was checking either her own watch or clock, "at least thirty-two more minutes of sleep. Thanks Rizz. I love you and please tell Mommy I love her too."

Marissa swallowed around the quickly formed lump in her throat. Now she genuinely did feel like running the six miles simply to pull her caller into a tight embrace. "I love you right back Miranda and I will most definitely relay the heartwarming message. You have a good day at school and I'll see you this evening." Their conversation ending, she slipped the phone back into her pocket as she arrived at the impressively neat desk of someone twenty-one years younger than her and thought of her own desk at the firm. It wasn't chaotic but it wasn't nearly as organized as Miranda's. Perhaps she should ask her for some tips. Smiling, Marissa picked up the picture and pulling the chair back, she sat down to admire it further.

Her smile grew as she recalled this scene. It happened two nights before...the Chandler party. In Miranda's painting they were lounging on a large blanket spread out on the floor of their den wearing smiles and pajamas as they played a rousing game of Candy Land. Since the maximum players was four and she was still learning how to play it anyway, Gabrielle was their cheerleader. In the background a Harry Potter DVD played on a large flat screen television and on the blanket lay a pizza box with one slice of pepperoni left inside, a near empty bowl of salad and a plate that had two brownies left on it. Their pint-sized cheerleader didn't take long to fall asleep, but AJ and Miranda convinced the two adults to let them stay up until 10 o'clock.

Sighing, Marissa hung her head as the thought invaded her mind that their Candy Land party was the last fun filled family evening they shared. She had tried to put together a game night since and although the kids participated it wasn't the same without Bianca. There was a noticeably vacant space on that blanket and she found herself wanting to curl into a ball and weep like a baby. Thankfully, Marissa was able to keep her emotions under control. At least until she had a certain adorable trio tucked into their beds and then she curled into her own and proceeded to cry herself to sleep. When she awakened in the early morning there was a small arm laying over her side and when she shifted so that her back was pressed into the mattress, she discovered Miranda fast asleep. Marissa produced a couple of theories. Either the little girl heard her crying or was attentive enough to notice that she could use some comfort and came in to spoon her or Miranda was in need of comforting herself. Perhaps both theories were true. Regardless, that was the most restful sleep the redhead had since the night before the Chandler party.

She lay there quietly while her new bed buddy continued to slumber until Miranda stirred thirty-something minutes later. Marissa asked her if she wanted to assist with making waffles and was happy to view the smile lighting up her face as she eagerly nodded. Mimo and Rizz. They definitely had become buddies in these last few weeks and Marissa believed that it really took flight the day she brought Miranda to the hospital.

_Because she needed to keep her mind occupied, Marissa opted to give the dishwasher a rest by manually cleaning the dishes after dinner. Gabrielle was in the den helping AJ select a movie for them all to watch this Saturday evening while Miranda volunteered to help her clean up the kitchen. Drying and buffing a set of drinking glasses until they practically sparkled, Miranda slid them toward Marissa to be placed in the cabinet that she wasn't yet tall enough to reach without a footstool. When they were almost done, she removed the plastic from a flattened bag of popcorn kernels and put it in the microwave. While small fluffy and buttery treats were created, Miranda folded a dishcloth as she thought of what she wanted to ask._

_"Hey Rizz?"_

_"Yes sweet thing?" _

_"You and I need to talk." _

_Tossing a disposable Clorox wipe in the trash, the redhead looked at her recognizing the serious expression. "Lemme guess. You didn't like my meatloaf." When Miranda giggled, she began to smile. _

_"Yeah, you're right. That's why I only ate two slices. Who wants to eat meatloaf so moist, flavorful and with gooey yummy cheese in the middle?"_

_Hm, now Marissa was aware of two Montgomerys' who could cause her to blush. "Aw, Mimo thanks but I couldn't have done it without your help. Would have been difficult to form a loaf using only one hand and three fingers of the other." She indicated the spotless kitchen table. "Let's go sit over there. How about I make us a couple cups of cocoa for our chat?" Miranda immediately turned her down as she pulled out a chair. Oh, this truly was serious because the seven-year-old never turned down the hot chocolaty beverage smothered in marshmallows, just the way she preferred it. _

_"So what's on your mind?" Marissa quietly asked, mimicking the little girl by folding her hands on the table. _

_"I read the Pine Valley Hospital ICU visitors policy so I know you have to be at least thirteen to go in, but you think that maybe you could push some strings?" _

_"Pull some strings?"_

_Miranda nodded. "Yeah, I meant pull. Rizz I really need to see Mommy and I know she's sleeping and she's hooked up to stuff but I'm not scared. I don't think Gabby should be allowed but I can handle it." Brown eyes identical to her mother's pleading, she reached over to place a hand atop Marissa's, mindful not to put pressure on the splint covered hand. "Please Rizz. I haven't seen her since last Friday so even if she doesn't know I'm there, I need to be there and even if it's only for a few minutes._

_"Baby, I don't-"_

_"Please don't say no. Just one visit."_

_While Marissa wordlessly ruminated, the only sounds in the kitchen was the rhythmic ticking of the clock nailed to the wall and the popping of their snacks in the final seconds of cooking. Although she stared toward the table, she could feel Miranda's eyes on her and when she finally raised her head she detected the hope mixed with a great deal of anxiousness in those eyes. "I can't promise you anything, but why don't you go see if AJ and Gabby have chosen a movie for us while I make a couple calls? I'll bring the popcorn and bev-oof!" The lawyer wasn't able to complete her sentence as she abruptly found herself with a lapful of Mimo. Small arms wrapped around her neck and grateful kisses reigned upon her cheek, Marissa laughed, hugging her young pal back. _

**#####**

_The following morning Marissa stood outside her partner's hospital room with Miranda beside her, both of them having just partaken of the anti-bacterial sanitizer located next to the entrance. The nerves visible on her face, she had a good grip on Marissa's healing yet still sprained hand. "You want to take a walk around the hospital and return in a little while Mimo? It's fine if you're not yet ready to go in."_

_She shook her head and glanced up at Marissa. "No, I'm ready now." She deeply inhaled while her hand was given a gentle squeeze. Miranda returned it three seconds before she proceeded to move forward into the room on her own. _

_Having to remind herself to breathe, Marissa remained just outside of the wide sliding glass doors and watched as Bianca's oldest child approached her bed. Chocolate eyes wide, Miranda observed the monitors, machines, IV, various tubes and wires her comatose mother was connected to. The equipment that most garnered her attention was the endotracheal tube that had been inserted into her mouth. That morning before they left the house, Marissa explained to her some of the things she would see and the breathing tube was a part of their discussion. There were actually two tubes leading to her mother's mouth. One tube carried warm and moistened air to her while the other tube carried exhaled air away from her. To hold the tubes in place, there was a strap around her head called an endotracheal tube holder, which completely hid her mouth. _

_Miranda inwardly repeated to herself what Marissa told her. Although these machines and tubes were alarming they were necessary and helping her mother to get better. Noticing a nearby chair, she pulled it closer to the bed. Instead of sitting in it, she knelt on the cushioned seat, glad that she was high enough to reach Bianca. Wrapping one hand around the railing for stability, she reached out to caress a cheek, small fingers stroking the soft skin. _

_"Good morning Mommy," Miranda started while attempting to blink away tears. "I've missed you. AJ and Gabby send their love and they miss you too and can't wait until you come home. Marissa is doing a great job with us but she needs and misses you too. We're not complete with only the four of us. We need our fifth family member at home-you. So you have to work on waking up okay? You're strong so I totally believe you can do it Mommy." _

_"Morning Rocky," Greenlee said, lightly bumping her hip against Marissa's. Watching the pair inside the ICU room, she asked, "How is it going in there?" _

_"She just went in and so far it's going well. Mimo is a tough little cookie so I think I was worried about this visit for nothing." After Miranda exited the kitchen the previous evening, Marissa first called the hospital and spoke with an ICU nurse about allowing the seven-year-old to visit her mother. By the end of their nearly ten minute conversation, she had the nurse convinced that Miranda was indeed capable of handling a brief visit. Next on her short list to call was Miranda's grand...well, Miranda's Mommy's mother. Marissa had decided that if Erica and Kendall didn't both agree then she wouldn't bring the little girl to the hospital. Fortunately, she didn't need to convince either one of them as they were immediately on board with the idea. They did mention that Gabrielle shouldn't be taken but her older sister could understand. _

_"How was your night Speed Racer?" The redhead inquired, carefully sliding her left hand into her jeans pocket. _

_"Oh, fine. Bianca and I watched a Friends marathon. Didn't go to sleep until after three in the morning." Last Saturday after Bianca was admitted to the ICU just a few hours following her surgery, her loved ones created an overnight visitor's schedule. Since she was permitted to have one person spend the night, they decided to take advantage of the policy by having someone with her every night. Greenlee volunteered to take the Saturday night shift and spent most of her time in the most comfortable recliner that she parked next to Bianca's bed while watching one of her all time favorite sitcoms. Soon after three in the morning she moved to the sleeper sofa, which folded out to a bed for visitor usage. _

_"Nick at Nite?"_

_Greenlee shook her head. "I own the complete ten season box set. Nice that her room has a DVD player. You think Erica had something to do with that? As many times as we've visited or been patients ourselves in this hospital, I don't ever remember spotting a DVD player in the rooms. TV yes, Internet access yes and I believe I've seen a VCR or two around here, but never a state of the art disc player." _

_Marissa softly chuckled. "Maybe. We'll have to check the other rooms."_

_Greenlee held up a square white box. "There's a fresh pot of coffee in the waiting room and we can fix Mimo a cup of hot chocolate or get her a milk. I just bought a variety of croissants and there's a strawberry cream cheese with your name on it."_

_"You have a chocolate chip in there for me?" _

_Greenlee and Marissa turned to see Kendall and her mother. They graced the Kane women with smiles, although Greenlee's smile for Erica landed in the neighborhood of reserved as did Erica's responding smile and slight head nod. During the past week they were surprisingly on their best behavior where each other was concerned and once they learned that Bianca had slipped into a coma, Greenlee even offered her usual arch nemesis a hug. Sure it only lasted about three seconds but it may have been progress. _

_"You only want one chocolate chip? No wonder you resemble a swizzle stick's twin." _

_Kendall smirked at her friend. "Nothing wrong with my weight and if there were I could always gain more. Too bad you can't say the same for your height."_

_While Erica covered her mouth to conceal a smile, a laugh slipped from Marissa's lips without her consent. Clearing her throat, she gave them her best "don't make me send you to your bedroom" look. "As entertaining as your Abbott and Costello routine is, let's all concentrate on the little one in there with her mom." _

_Sufficiently chastised, the comedy duo along with Erica and Marissa turned their full attention toward the room just as the aforementioned little one began singing. Marissa quickly recognized it as the song she overheard Bianca singing to AJ to soothe him after his bad dream. She softly smiled while thinking of the brunette teasing her about not knowing the song, which for some reason she had fully expected her to. Purchasing the track from the Internet, Marissa put it on repeat with her mp3 player, deciding that she was in love with it after the third restart. _

_We were born before the wind_

_Also younger than the sun_

_Ere the bonnie boat was won as we sailed into the mystic_

_Hark, now hear the sailors cry_

_Smell the sea and feel the sky_

_Let your soul and spirit fly into the mystic_

_Four sets of eyes were filled with tears as the quartet continued listening to Miranda's tender performance. Still caressing her mother's cheek, tears escaped Miranda's eyes. Occasionally her voice cracked yet she managed to keep singing. _

_And when that fog horn blows I will be coming home_

_And when that fog horn blows I want to hear it_

_I don't have to fear it_

_And I wanna rock your gypsy soul_

_Just like way back in the days of old_

_Then magnificently we will float into the mystic..._

_**#####**_

_"You barely touched your croissant. You want to stop somewhere and get brunch? Just you and I? And then maybe we could go to the mall. I'll let you go nuts at the toy store and we can buy AJ and Gabby something too. Surprise 'em." Seated next to Marissa in the back seat, Miranda wordlessly shook her head while she stared out of the window at the passing scenery. As the chauffeur Erica hired on a full-time basis to drive them around until Marissa was able to resume doing so braked at a red light, the redhead sighed. Her young pal had been quiet since they left the hospital. She hugged and greeted the women who watched her sing, but afterward asked Marissa if they could leave. She hadn't uttered a word since they boarded the elevator. _

_"You have a very pretty voice," Marissa tried complimenting, reaching over to gently pinch Miranda's cheek . "I'm having a difficult time choosing who sounds better between you and your mom." That did it. The dam broke, Miranda's shoulders shaking while countless tears began running down her face. "Mimo..." Removing her seatbelt, Marissa hurried across the seat and wrapped her arms around the weeping child. _

_"I...I failed Mari...I failed her...Marissa," the child sobbed, burying her dampened face against Marissa's side._

_"No, no." The lawyer adamantly shook her head although Miranda couldn't view it. "What makes you think you failed anyone sweetheart?" _

_"Bu...but I did. I failed."_

_Marissa looked up and immediately caught the attention of their chauffeur through the rearview mirror, his eyes filled with sympathy. "As soon as it's safe could you please pull over Brady?" _

_"Of course Ms. Tasker." As many times as Marissa had asked him to refer to her by her first name he never listened despite insisting that she call him by his. "The park is less than half a mile away. I could stop there if you and Ms. Miranda would like to take a walk." _

_"Perfect. Thank you Brady." _

_A few minutes later, Marissa was seated on a park bench next to the lake with Miranda placed sideways on her lap so she could easily view her face. She had calmed down but she appeared absolutely miserable while staring at the crumpled tissues in her hand. When Marissa softly uttered her name, she looked up._

_"What did you mean when you said that you failed her?" _

_"Mommy. I failed Mommy." Somehow her miserable expression amplified. _

_"Why do you believe that?"_

_"Do you know that Mommy was deeply asleep before?"_

_Marissa nodded, her heart rate quickening as thoughts of him invaded her mind. "I know." __**First that SOB may have pushed her off of a balcony and now he shoots - no, this isn't the time to get riled up. Focus on Mimo.**_

_"Well her mom once told me that I woke Mommy up when it looked like she would never do so and I was just a baby then. She said I was what Mommy needed and it was a Christmas miracle. I thought...I thought maybe this time I could help her wake up again." Those brown eyes started to glisten. "But it didn't work. I talked and I sang the song that she taught me but nothing worked, so I failed." When tears fell, Miranda used her tissues to wipe them away. _

_"Hey, no Miranda you listen to me. You did not fail your Mommy. You were amazing today with her but it's not your responsibility to wake her up. And yes she's still asleep, but I am beyond certain that your visit helped her and that she heard you and loved that you were there. She's still sleeping because her body just needs to rest sweetheart."_

_It took a few moments, but Miranda finally nodded. "She's gonna wake up right?"_

_Marissa wore the brightest smile possible. "Yup, you're right. With a capital R-I-G-H-T!" _

_Her young pal chuckled and then happily surprised her with a hug. Their arms were still around each other, her face pressed into Marissa's neck when she posed her next question. "Rizz if it takes a while or...or a lot of time goes by and Mommy doesn't wake up what'll happen to Gabby and I? Will Mama Reese take us like she wanted earlier this year?"_

_"Would you want to live with Reese?" Marissa didn't realize that she was holding her breath as she waited for an answer. _

_Miranda pulled back to look at her. "I love her but I don't really wanna live with her any more. Visit yes, but not live. I know you and Mommy haven't been together long, but I'd rather stay with you." _

_Now hazel eyes started glistening. "Me?" Relatively calm on the outside, Marissa was doing cartwheels within. During the last week living arrangements for the girls hadn't been discussed. Marissa had waited for Kendall or Erica to mention wanting to bring them to either of their homes and was delighted that so far they seemed content with her keeping them. _

_Miranda nodded again. "I love Mama Reese and before her I loved Maggie and Mommy loved them too, but you're different," she paused and it was obvious from the expression on her face that she was in deep thought so her older friend remained silent. "I don't think she's ever been happier and she glows when she looks at you. It was...almost two weeks ago, I came in the kitchen where she was cooking dinner and she didn't know I was there. You called and I could tell by her side of the conversation that you were on your way home. When she put her cell down she started dancing a bit and she was smiling. See that's how happy you make her. Because of you Rizz she can dance without hearing any music. I don't remember her doing that before so I thank you for that and I love you for making Mommy glow. Those are just a couple reasons why I wanna stay with you no matter what." _

_As the redhead started to cry, Miranda pulled a fresh tissue from her pocket and dabbed the salty moisture away for her. Smiling through the tears, Marissa kissed the tip of her nose. "You know what Mimo?"_

_"What?" _

_"You're one of the coolest, smartest and terrific kids on the planet and I love you too sweetheart. Speaking of dancing would you dance with me?" _

_"Without music?"_

_"I'll see what I can do." Once they rose from the bench, Marissa reached down to lift Miranda into her arms. _

_"Rizz you're hands!" _

_"I gotcha Mimo. I'll be careful." Ignoring the discomfort, she managed to pick her young pal up, Miranda's legs secured on either side of her waist and her arms wrapped around Marissa's neck. Moving closer to the lake, Marissa started dancing and serenading Miranda with the song she performed for her mother less than an hour ago. During the majority of the song, she lay her cheek on Marissa's shoulder, yet toward the end of it she couldn't help but to join in and from the smile on her dance partner's face, she was thrilled to have it turned into a duet. She twirled them around, hoping that they wouldn't get dizzy._

_When that fog horn blows you know I will be coming home_

_And when that fog horn whistle blows I got to hear it_

_I don't have to fear it_

_And I want to rock your gypsy soul_

_Just like way back in the days of old_

_And together we will float into the mystic_

_Come on girl..._

_**#####**_

Despite the chilly air surrounding her, Marissa could feel drops of sweat gliding along her skin as she kept up a steady pace through the neighborhood. Relieved that she was almost home, she could just imaging gulping orange juice to quench the thirst her jogging had caused. She was three houses away, picking up the pace when she arrived at the Dupree home. For a moment she thought she would pass without being noticed but then she heard her name being called in a Southern drawl. _Just ignore it. _Marissa stopped after the third utterance, which was shouted. With a dramatic sigh she turned around and pasted on a smile for the approaching buxom blonde. _Why didn't I bring my iPod? Then later on I could claim, "Oh sorry, I didn't hear you with the ear buds blasting music!" _Marissa gave herself a mental thump on the head. _Better yet choose a different route to jog. _

"Look at you runnin' along the sidewalk like you just stole somebody's purse!" As her neighbor grinned, blue eyes raked over Marissa's form making her feel like a turkey being sized up with November around the corner.

"Good morning Delilah."

The blonde neighbor clucked her tongue. "How many times do I have to say it? Call me Deli. Ya know, like a sandwich shop!" She laughed loud enough to awaken the entire block, including those who may have slept with earplugs.

"Right, Deli." _Better yet purchase a treadmill._

Delilah Dupree pointed toward her open front door. "Come on inside Marissa. I have something I wanna give you."

The redhead glanced toward the door thinking, _bet you do, but I don't wanna receive it._ "Actually Deli I have to get going..."

"Oh sugar this won't take long. Now come on!" Grabbing Marissa's hand, she pulled the smaller woman toward her house.

_Oh crap, I'm gonna be on a milk carton. _Once they arrived in the foyer, Marissa refused to budge any further. "I'll wait for you here."

Brows that were a bit darker than her hair bounced up and down. "What's the matter? Afraid I'm gonna put a chloroform soaked cloth over your nose and then drag you down to my basement where I tie you up with some rope and duct tape?"

_Well now I am. Too detailed a 'joke'. _She arched a brow. "Deli..."

"Okay sugar, you stay here and I'll go get it. Be back in two shakes of a lamb's tail!"

Marissa thought about making a run for it, but she guessed that Delilah would just show up at her residence in a few minutes anyway so she might as well stick around and get this over with. Half a minute later the bubbly woman returned with a 9X13 glass baking dish covered with aluminum foil. Not another one. Marissa groaned. What was this? Casserole number five? She stuffed her hands into her pullover pockets before Delilah could extend the dish for her to take.

"I made you and your brood another casserole." She looked so pleased that her visitor felt a twinge of guilt. "This one is chicken florentine. The kids'll love it! Chicken breasts, spinach, bacon, mozzarella and parmesan cheese..." Delilah grinned. "It's to die for."

And as Marissa recalled casserole number two felt like it would be. That Monday was one of the worst ones ever after eating Delilah Dupree's 'famous' (or more accurately infamous) tuna noodle casserole for Sunday dinner. Marissa stayed home from work, the kids from school and they spent the majority of the day bent over the porcelain goddess. After that casserole number three (which had a peculiar odor anyway) was introduced to the garbage disposal and AJ was brave enough to sample casserole number four because it contained pizza ingredients. The look on his face had the ladies seated around the dining room table putting their forks down and Miranda suggesting that they order Chinese takeout.

"Thank you Deli, but I already have dinner planned for tonight."

"Save that for tomorrow."

"Well it's cooking."

Delilah appeared skeptical. "This early?"

"I'm using the crockpot so it'll take all day and be ready this evening," Marissa quickly falsified. _Please don't ask me what I'm cooking._

"Oh, okay. So save the chicken florentine for tomorrow. Just heat it up in the oven like the others. Here ya go."

There it was presented for her to take and yet Marissa kept her hands in her pockets. She sighed. "I can't accept that."

"Why not?"

"As much as I appreciate you taking the time to prepare them, my children don't really care for casserole," she tried to say as delicately as possible.

"But these are delicious! Everybody loves my casseroles."

Marissa attempted to cover _her_ skepticism. Did those included in 'everybody' not have taste buds? "They don't. I'm sorry."

Blue eyes rolling, Delilah faintly smiled. "These kids today. They just want junk food."

_My kids just want appetizing food that doesn't make them sick to their stomachs!_ The vibration against her thigh and the familiar ringtone prevented her from saying that aloud. _Saved by McBadAss! _"Excuse me Delilah." She pulled her cell out. "I need to take this." As the blonde nodded, Marissa answered. "Hi Kendall."

_"Hey you. Did you jog to Llanview?"_

The lawyer chuckled. "I ran into Delilah on the way home and we were just chatting."

_"Ugh. Do you want me to come rescue you?"_

"Thanks. I'm fine hon."

_"Well your breakfast is ready..." _

"Kendall, you don't have to cook-"

_"I know I don't __**have**__ to. I __**want **__to. And technically I didn't cook this meal. Your mother did. I just picked it up from her restaurant and brought it to your house so get your sweaty buns over here and eat Rocky."_

She chuckled a bit more. "I'm on my way. See you soon." Pocketing the phone Marissa looked at the woman still holding an unwanted casserole. "Gotta go Deli. Kendall has breakfast ready. Ha! That rhymes!"

"I bet that's not the only thing she has ready for you."

"Pardon?"

"I've seen the way she interacts with you and how much she dotes on you. Lemme put it this way. I bet Kendall would like nothin' more than to lick the cream from your Oreo."

Hazel eyes widened with a healthy dose of shock. "Delilah!" _I may never look at that Nabisco cookie the same way again._

"What? I'm just tellin' it like I see it sugar."

"Number one, Kendall is my friend. My platonic friend and that's all she and I want to be. Two, she's happily married and to a man. Three, even if she were attracted to women she would never pursue someone involved with her sister who she loves and respects a great deal. And you Delilah, you want to talk about someone desiring to lick someone else's cream? My partner, the woman who is the love of my life has been in the hospital for weeks in a coma and you have made your intentions abundantly clear! Here I am trying to keep it together, remain positive and take care of three children and it seems every chance you get you're ogling and flirting with me. Do yourself a favor and look up the word class in the dictionary and then attempt to get some." Marissa was about to storm off but then remembered that she had one more thing to get off her chest. "Oh, and it's not that my children don't like casserole or food that doesn't fall under the category of junk. They just don't like your food. Your casseroles are dreadful and I wouldn't feed them to my worst enemy except for my ex-husband!"

**#####**

After she poured steaming coffee into her travel mug, Kendall turned to her friend who sat at the kitchen table chewing a forkful of omelette. "I have an important Fusion meeting to get to so can I trust you to eat all of that without being supervised?"

Marissa smirked as she reached for her chilled glass of orange juice. "Yes ma'am. I'll make a pretty plate. I'll even send you a picture via your cell of the empty plate when I'm done."

"I mean it Marissa." Although she smiled, Kendall looked completely serious. "I can tell you've lost weight and I don't want Binks when she awakens kicking my butt for not taking good care of you. Please finish your breakfast."

"Kendall you don't have-"

"Just you promise me."

"Okay," Marissa replied, her voice growing quiet. "I promise." When she rose to embrace the other woman Kendall jumped back as if she just spotted a large spider crawling across the floor.

"Hug me later after you've scrubbed yourself in the shower Rocky!"

Laughing, the redhead reoccupied her seat. "You're so not right! I don't smell bad."

Eyes twinkling, Kendall grinned. "Never said you smelled bad. You're just damp with perspiration. I want a rain check on that hug." She winked as the doorbell rang. "Oh, that's probably your ride to the hospital."

"You know I'm capable of driving myself now. The doctor removed my splint."

"The doctor _just _removed your splint. Continue rebuilding the strength in that hand before you get behind the wheel. I'll get the door." Walking up to Marissa she bent over to place a kiss on the top of her head. "See you later. Tell my girl I love her. I'll drop by on my lunch break and bring you yours." Before Marissa could argue about Kendall presenting her with another meal, the older woman hurriedly left the kitchen.

Travel mug in hand, Kendall opened the front door without peeking through the peephole. Observing the person on the other side of it, she raised an eyebrow. "Maggie."

**##########**

"Into the Mystic" : Written and performed by Van Morrison


	10. Chapter 10

**The bad news: I know it's taken me longer than usual to get this chapter out. I'm sorry. It's just that May has been my least favorite month thus far this year. However! Good news: This chapter is the longest yet ;) Thanks so much for your amazing reviews on the previous chapter and I'm crossing my digits that you enjoy this one.**

**##########**

_Soon after her surgery was completed and they learned that Bianca was going to be moved to the ICU ward, the emergency waiting room began to clear out, some stating that they would return during the day or at least call someone amongst her immediate family. It was just after six in the morning and Erica, Jack, Kendall, Zach and Marissa remained. Up until a few minutes ago, Krystal had been there but Marissa encouraged her to go home and check on her youngest daughter. It wasn't easy and she practically had to push the woman onto the elevator, but finally her mother relented. However, before the elevator doors could shut, Krystal promised that she would be back well before noon._

_They had the ICU waiting room to congregate in now and as she sat inside there alone for the time being, Kendall thought about how much nicer it was. The spacious room offered comfortable seating that included padded chairs most of which were arranged around circular tables, a quartet of recliners and two couches. There was also a large screen television, a small desk with a computer placed atop it that families were allowed to use free of charge and near it a bookshelf laden with magazines, novels, a few packs of playing cards and board games. Against another wall was a table with both a single serve and 12-cup coffee maker, stacked cups and an assortment of ground coffee, coffee pods, sugars and creams._

_Erica and Jack were visiting with Bianca in her private room, Zach headed to the restroom and Marissa had stated that she was taking another walk after she escorted her mother to the elevator. Minutes before when she watched the younger woman walking away, Kendall hoped that she didn't find JR this time because she didn't have any hands left to punch him with. She chuckled to herself while thinking that Marissa could always use her feet. She chuckled again as it occurred to her that the petite redhead did kick him once. __**Right between the legs. Awesome girlfriend my uber awesome sister has.**_

_Kendall covered her mouth as a yawn escaped, quickly followed by two more. How very fatigued she was yet she didn't have any plans to fall asleep any time soon. There was too much that had to be taken care of today. She and Zach should have been on their way to New York this morning for a romantic weekend getaway but instead they were at PVH hoping and praying that her little sister would survive JR Chandler's senseless violence. Oh, God please help her to heal, both her body and her spirit. Against Kendall's will the tears began to flow and with her elbows on her thighs, she concealed her face with open palms. _

_"Kendall? Did she...she's still with us isn't she?" A soft hesitant voice inquired. _

_It was a voice that Kendall recognized although she hadn't heard it in nearly five years. She raised her tear stained face to peer up at the other woman, spotting her worried expression. "She's alive." The visitor sighed with relief and then burst into tears. Instead of comforting her, Kendall pointed to a table with a box of Kleenex on it and as she walked over to pull out a couple of tissues she asked, "What are you doing here?"_

_The visitor wiped her cheeks with one tissue and blew her nose with the other. "I heard about what happened. It's on the news already and I damn near fainted when I heard that Bianca had been..." Regarding Kendall, she shook her head. "I had to come. Did so as fast as I could."_

_"Obviously. How could you have arrived here so quickly from France Maggie? I believe even a nonstop flight takes about eight hours."_

_Grabbing a chair, she pulled it in front of Kendall and sat down facing her. "I drove here from Philadelphia where I now live. I left Paris in late 2007."_

_"You've been in Philadelphia for the last four years?" _

_"No. I moved back to Pennsylvania after I graduated from medical school in May 2009 and I was matched with a hospital in Philly where I started my internship that July. It was during my shift I heard the news. I was checking on a patient and their television was on." Maggie curiously observed Kendall's attire. "Have you left the cosmetic business and entered into the medical field?"_

_Kendall glanced down at her scrubs. "Uh no. My other outfit was ruined." She noted the curious expression remained and sighed. "Marissa and I were trying to staunch the blood and...our dresses were ruined."_

_Maggie's face paled while more tears filled her eyes and it took her a few moments to be able to respond. "I'm so sorry Kendall. That must have been horrible to witness."_

_"Horrible doesn't begin to describe it." Kendall loudly exhaled. "Look Maggie-" Before she could continue, Zach entered the waiting room splitting a tired smile between the two of them. After he leaned down to deliver a kiss to his spouse's cheek, he greeted Maggie, surprising both women when he hugged her. Mrs. Kendall Hart-Slater's resulting eye roll was missed._

_"Hi Zach," Maggie said as he pulled away. Her mouth opened and shut several times before she acquired further speech. "I'm not sure what to say to you. Last year I heard about...and now you're back...it's a miracle. Now it's Bianca's turn to give us one."_

_"She will." He sounded so confident that Maggie and Kendall's spirits instantly elevated. "What the hell kind of transportation did you take to get here? Whatever it is I want one."_

_"You want a 2002 Honda Civic?" She shrugged. "I can't picture you in one of those but okay. Check Craigslist. I bet someone is selling that model."_

_"Oh, you moved back to the states?" She nodded. "How long you been here?"_

_"Four years. Philadelphia two years and about four months."_

_"Doing the doctor thing?"_

_Maggie displayed a brief smile. "Yeah, third year resident now."_

_"Cool." Zach appeared genuinely impressed. "Have you decided on a specialty yet?"_

_Kendall decided it was time that she interrupt. She started by clearing her throat. "The two of you can feel free to pour yourselves cups of coffee and settle down to chit chat about this and whatever else later, but right now Maggie you and I need to have a serious conversation about why exactly your ass - ahem, you are here." _

_Clearing his own throat, Zach pulled out his phone. "You know what?" He started, glancing between the two women. "I have some phone calls to make so I'll step out for a bit."_

_"You have phone calls to make this early in the morning on a Saturday?" Maggie inquired. Her eyes plead with him to stay, because it suddenly occurred to her that she didn't wish to be alone with his wife. Unfortunately, either Zach didn't notice the message she attempted to send him or he chose to ignore it. Oh well, part of her didn't blame him for wanting to flee because all hell was probably about to be broken loose and in her honor. Excusing himself with a smile, Zach walked out, Kendall and Maggie watching until he disappeared around the corner. _

_"Kendall I-"_

_"Maggie let's start with what I just said. Why exactly did you come here?"_

_"Because I wanted to check on Bianca. I'm concerned about her. I still love her and I couldn't stay away," Maggie replied, her voice having grown so soft that Kendall had to lean forward to hear her. _

_"Ever heard of a phone?"_

_"Ever heard of you hanging up on me or just ignoring my call if I tried that?"_

_"I doubt you have my number. You could have called the hospital."_

_"Since I'm not a relative I wouldn't have been told anything."_

_"Fine. Your cousin David. You know his number?"_

_Although her expression was filled with exasperation, Maggie nodded. "David and I keep in contact. In fact, his influence was the reason I was able to transfer back to the United States to finish medical school. It would have been virtually impossible without him helping me. Kendall, even if I could have learned everything about her condition from a simple phone call, it wouldn't have been enough. I needed to be here, to see her."_

_Kendall's eyebrows jumped upward. "Oh you wanna see her? Sure!" While the other woman quizzically watched, she pulled out her phone and flipped through her pictures until she found one with her sister and Marissa. Taken yesterday in her backyard, it was a comical photo of Marissa in the midst of a laugh as she fed Bianca (who had tucked a makeshift bib into her collar) a spoonful of chili. Swallowing around the small lump in her throat, Kendall began flipping again, stopping at a candid photo of the pair. While everyone was outside, they took advantage of the living room couch, involved in a PG make out session. Kendall had snuck in just as their lips were about to part and wearing a mischievous smile, she raised her camera phone and aimed. She captured the moment when their eyes were closed and their foreheads touched, the most tranquil smiles on their blushing faces. So adorable. Neither of them knew that she had taken it and now Kendall was thinking about having it enlarged and framed as a Christmas present for them. _

_She held her phone out for Maggie to view its screen. "If you wanna see her, there she is. And oh look, her much beloved, cherished and adored girlfriend is seated right next to her."_

_Maggie sighed when she focused on the digital photo. She spoke when Kendall lowered the phone. "Kendall I'm not here to...well rekindle what Bianca and I once shared. I realize that that ship has sailed. I'm here because I still care about her and I always will."_

_"You care hmm? Like you cared when you jumped into bed with some chick named Celeste?"_

_"Cecilia."_

_Light eyes narrowed. "It wasn't necessary for you to correct me." Maggie apologized so swiftly that her words tripped over each other. "Just go home and continue doing your doctor thing as Zach refers to it."_

_The medical resident remained seated. "I had an affair years ago. Are you going to persecute me for the rest of my life?"_

_"Wouldn't have to if you'd be so kind as to stay out of my sister's life. Leave and never come near us again and I won't utter another negative word about or to you."_

_"Kendall not a day...not one single day goes by that I don't think about how much I fucked up. How I ruined," her voice cracking, Maggie paused until she felt capable of proceeding. "How I ruined what I was fortunate enough to share with the most important person in my life. I had Bianca Montgomery's love, which is so very special and I took that...her for granted and for as long as I live I will never forgive myself for my selfish and reckless behavior. Despite what I did, I still love your sister dearly. I'll love her beyond the day I die and I honestly don't believe I could love any woman that much again." Tears pouring down her face, Maggie gripped her knees while staring at the second oldest Kane woman. "I made a huge mistake and I'm certain that I'm not the only person in this room with faults. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I wish I could take it back but it's done and it's in the past and I want to be here now. _

_"I often work crazy shifts at the hospital, but I intend to be here as much as possible. For now I can stay through the weekend and I won't have to head back until Monday evening. I'll do anything to help. I just...I want to help in some way. If you and your family are hungry I'll fetch meals, I'll babysit your children and I'll volunteer at Fusion. Hell, I'll wax your car, collect your mail or pick up your dry cleaning if you want. I just want to do something that helps you guys. Please Kendall, don't make me leave."_

_Kendall shook her head while releasing a soft sigh. "I don't own Pine Valley or this hospital," she stated, her voice not sounding quite as angry._

_"Meaning?"_

_"Blow your nose." _

_"Huh?"_

_"All those tears and your nose is all red and...just blow it." She stood and retrieved the box of tissues, dropping them in Maggie's lap. Once the young doctor had blown three times and sufficiently wiped, Kendall spoke again. "I won't fight you any longer as long as you don't have ulterior motives, but good luck with my mother."_

_Maggie groaned. Comparing the two of them, Kendall was a drizzle to the hurricane she still had to contend with. "Oh, shit." She blew her nose again while Kendall actually snickered._

**#####**

Travel mug in hand, Kendall opened the front door without peeking through the peephole. Observing the person on the other side of it, she raised an eyebrow. "Maggie."

The other woman mimicked her by raising her own brow. "Kendall." When the curly-haired brunette continued to stare at her, Maggie raised the other brow and then glanced toward her digital watch. "Do you think I'm late? Because according to my watch I'm fourteen minutes early although it's not like I simply **had **to be here by a specific time since PVH never closes. Wouldn't that just suck if it did though? You show up with an injury and there's a 'sorry, we're closed' sign fixed to the entrance?" Maggie rhythmically slapped her palms against her thighs, a tiny smile on her lips.

"Are you okay? You're awfully verbose for it being so early in the morning."

"Just fine. On the drive here I emptied a couple of Rockstar cans and ate a handful of chocolate covered espresso beans so I'm a little wired."

Studying her face, Kendall's eyes narrowed. "Have you been getting adequate sleep?"

"Being a resident I fit in as much as I possibly can. S'okay. I've trained myself to be recharged with a minimum of two hours. Why? I don't look rested?"

Kendall immediately shook her head. "To be perfectly honest you look like crap. Crap that's been boiled, then allowed to cool and then frozen, unthawed on the kitchen counter and then nuked in the microwave."

The younger woman smirked. "Please don't hold back Kendall. Just tell me exactly how you feel."

"Sorry. Just call 'em like I see 'em."

"Apparently." She glanced over the taller woman's shoulder. "Where's the nicer one?"

"In the kitchen eating breakfast. Do me a favor and make sure she finishes? I've caught her more than once attempting to sneak food into the garbage disposal." Maggie nodded. "And I think it would behoove you to take a nap before you get behind the wheel again. Marissa can wait two to three more hours to go to the hospital."

The resident appeared dubious. "Na ah. I can predict how that'll play out. I wake up in a little while to discover that she's kidnapped my Honda. A nap does sound nice, but I'll wait until we reach our destination and then I'll stretch out on one of those comfy couches in the waiting room."

"Maggie - "

"Kendall, I'm fine. Now go to work and be productive 'cause Dr. Stone needs a new shade of lipstick." She pursed lips only covered by a thin layer of lip balm.

"You know, _Dr. Stone_ we do more than sit around coming up with lipsticks."

Maggie nodded. "Oh of course you do. Get busy on some eye shadow too!"

"Keep it up and your car won't be the only thing around here that's kidnapped."

"Ooh, I'm shaking in my sneakers!" She grinned while Kendall rolled her eyes.

"Whenever you two leave please drive safely. I'll see you both for lunch around one o'clock. Sandwiches and soup okay with you?"

Maggie stepped to the side so the other woman could pass by. "I'd prefer lobster and a fancy bottle of wine since I'm not on call."

"Okay. Sandwiches and soup it is." Kendall waved with her free hand. "See you later Stone."

"Please put a doctor behind my surname Mrs. Hart-Slater."

Not turning around, Kendall replied, "Then call me McBadAss."

"You perform one thoracostomy and think you're all that and a bag of Doritos." Maggie smiled, hearing Kendall's laughter as she headed toward her car.

**#####**

"These are delicious!" Marissa commented just before introducing another espresso bean to her mouth. Moments after she slid into the passenger seat of Maggie's car, she spotted the fragrant small brown paper bag on the dashboard. She was able to save an inquiry since once she was settled in the drivers' seat, her cousin offered to share its contents. They were about two miles from the hospital as Marissa swallowed her tenth caffeinated bean.

Maggie glanced toward her, flashing a grin. "Oh, yeah. I found them a few months back and I'm pretty much addicted. Great little pick me up." Finishing her remaining beans, the redhead nodded while she chewed. "How is your...what was it? Hatcher case?"

"Thatcher?"

"Yeah, that's the one. How's that going?"

Someone from fifty feet away could easily observe Marissa's proud beam. "I didn't believe we'd have this settled until nearly Thanksgiving but Wednesday I was able to persuade Mr. Thatcher not to be so difficult where his children and soon to be ex-wife were concerned. It worked out so much better than I had originally anticipated."

Maggie removed her right hand long enough from the steering wheel to squeeze the lawyer's shoulder. "Good job cuz." She liked her newly acquainted with first cousin once removed. Damn it she actually genuinely liked Marissa despite the initial jealousy of discovering that the love of her life was in another relationship after her divorce earlier in the year. After she convinced Kendall not to argue about her staying in Pine Valley, moments later Marissa entered the waiting room and they officially met. It was awkward at first, considering both were aware that the other woman was in love with Bianca. Despite that, within minutes Maggie noticed the positive feelings for her cousin trickling in. She was kind, warm and soft spoken and the fact that she had inadvertently broken her hand while kicking the ass of the person responsible for Bianca's condition immensely impressed Maggie. Yeah, Marissa had her woman (well her ex-woman) but she couldn't help but to like and admire her. During the last few weeks they spent time together, sent emails/text messages and called she had truly come to think of Marissa as family.

"When do you have to go back to Philly? Can you stay through the weekend?" The redhead asked, surprising herself. She was even more surprised that she hoped her cousin would be in town at least a couple days. Based on what she shared with her, Bianca had some fascinating past love interests yet Marissa didn't wish to meet any of them. Less than twelve hours after Bianca was injured the person who Marissa suspected had obtained the largest section of her heart rolled into town. Reminding herself that she didn't have anything to fret over, that Maggie wasn't a threat, she gingerly shook the offered hand and thanked her for coming. Despite any initial uneasiness, it didn't take long for Marissa to warm up to her cousin and she had to confess that she liked her. Maggie was easy to talk with, funny and sweet. She could see why Bianca had fallen for her all those years ago. Regardless of their past relationship, it was terrific having another family member.

Braking at a stoplight, Maggie sent her cousin a smile. "Yes ma'am, I can. I have an early shift Monday so I figured I could leave late afternoon on Sunday."

"Cool. Miniature golf tomorrow?"

"Fine with me but you really want the kids to witness you thoroughly getting your butt kicked again?" While Marissa resembled a ten-year-old by sticking out her tongue, Maggie laughed as she proceeded through the intersection.

"I was still wearing the splint and my butt was so not kicked."

"Excuses, excuses and oh it so was. Honey, Gabrielle achieved a better score than you!"

"That's because the three of you took turns helping her."

"True, but she played a couple of the holes by herself and if memory serves me correctly she managed to sink her ball in fewer strokes than you did."

"What...ever. You shouldn't keep score when children are involved in a game anyway."

"That's what losers say." Maggie chuckled when a fist lightly punched her arm. "Oh, now she's abusive. Careful. You don't wanna break your hand again slugger."

The lawyer's ringing phone distracted her from offering a reply. "Hold on Tiger Woods. It's the other ex." While she reached for her phone, Maggie laughed once she recognized the music playing.

"You set _Gives You Hell _as her ringtone?"

A mischievous grin briefly touched Marissa's lips. "Most of the song probably doesn't apply, but I like the chorus." She shrugged. "I know it's juvenile."

"It's funny as hell!" Maggie was still laughing when her cousin hit the talk button.

"Good morning," Marissa said, her voice ten times more pleasant than her ringtone. "How're the girls?"

"_They're fine. We had a good start to the day. They ate their breakfast well and I've dropped them off at their respective schools. I called because I wanted to invite you and AJ to dinner and a movie. I know you planned on stopping by to see them but I figured you could stay for a while. That movie Miranda has been talking about premieres today so we could check out an early evening showing of it and then get something to eat. Bring Spike and Ian along too if their parents agree._"

"A Friday dinner and a movie sounds terrific and I'm sure they will. Gives them a rare evening to themselves." Marissa glanced toward the driver. "Maggie is in town. Mind if I invite her?" The young doctor smirked while Marissa awaited an answer.

"_Ah, sure. The more the merrier_."

She didn't sound all that merry but Marissa didn't bring attention to it. "What time should we be there?"

"_Movie starts at 6:15. You want to meet us outside the theater around 5:45? That should give us time to buy the tickets, raid the concession stand and find good seating_."

"Perfect. Which theater?"

"_The one across the street from the Pine Valley Galleria_."

"Okay. See you this evening then Reese."

"_Probably sooner. I plan on coming to the hospital later today_."

"Ah, sure. The more the merrier." Marissa heard her caller's light chuckle as she ended the call. She pocketed her phone. "So you wanna go catch a flick cuz?"

"How does one go about that? Will a net work?"

"Ha ha. You're too funny."

Maggie raised an eyebrow as she pulled into the PVH parking lot. "Speaking of funny, what was with the Tiger Woods rib? Did you call me that because I'm proficient at the miniature version of golf or because like him I was unfaithful to my lady?"

"Gee you're paranoid." The redhead grinned. "Because of your being...decent at mini golf."

"Just decent eh? I said proficient."

"I heard you. I said decent."

Grinning, Maggie located a parking space close to the entrance. "Jealous."

"What...ever."

The ignition shut off, both women unbuckled their seatbelts, within moments exited the car and headed side by side toward the hospital. A chill in the air, they walked briskly. "So what did Reese say when you asked if I could join you all?"

"She didn't have a problem with it."

Maggie snorted. "Yeah, I'm certain she was doing cartwheels over the idea of seeing me again."

Her cousin sighed. "Why can't the two of you just get along?"

Maggie raised both eyebrows. "Based on what you've shared with me at least we get along better than the two of you when you met."

Maggie Stone arrived the morning of September 24th and then Reese Williams the evening of September 25th. Upon meeting her cousin, Marissa mainly felt apprehension yet with Reese her blood began to boil seconds after she first lay eyes on her as she stood at the nurses station inquiring about Bianca's room number. She and Kendall were just returning from having dinner in the cafeteria and Marissa was replying to a question her friend had just posed as they left the elevator.

_"What the hell is she doing here?" Kendall muttered, interrupting the younger woman beside her. She stopped walking and after another step so did Marissa. _

_"Who?" _

_"Reese," Kendall replied, Reese's name from her lips sounding akin to a swear word. "As much as I can't stand that she's here, I have to hand it to my sister. Other than Ryan I can't think of any of my exes that would bother to show up while I'm hospitalized. Now I wouldn't be surprised if Lena were on a plane headed out of Poland as we speak."_

_Hazel eyes then fell on the woman at the nurses station dressed in a pair of designer jeans, a simple blouse and a jacket. A member of the ICU staff approached, Kendall and Marissa listening as Reese started to speak. "I've been out of the country and my plane just landed. Could you tell me what room Bianca Montgomery is in? I'm her wife."_

_"Ex-wife," a certain brunette and redhead simultaneously corrected. They turned toward one another, subtle amusement on their faces. _

_"Jinx, you owe me a Coke," Kendall hurriedly spoke, feeling like she had been transported back to the playground for a moment. _

_Marissa smirked. "I'll hit you up later." _

_Reese calling her ex-sister-in-law's name recaptured their attention. "Thanks so much for picking up a phone and calling me to let me know what happened to Bianca Friday night." Sarcasm noticed by those who were listening, including the ICU nurse, she practically tiptoed away from the situation. _

_No stranger to sarcasm, Kendall responded with some of her own. "Oh, you're so very welcome Reese. I can't tell you how glad I am that you appreciated it."_

_"How could you, your mother or __**someone**__ not spare a minute to call me? I had a right to know and I had to find out about the woman I love from the television! Thank God Erica Kane is famous enough that her daughter's shooting made international news."_

_Marissa spoke before Kendall could gather her words. "You weren't entitled to be called because you and Bianca are divorced. No one here was obligated to give you a heads up," she said, her voice quiet yet clear. _

_"We have children and they need their other mothers' support," Reese answered, although it was evident from her perplexed countenance that she wondered who the woman accompanying Kendall was._

_"Oh, you have children!" Appearing thoughtful, Marissa nodded. "I gotcha. Would these be the same children you haven't bothered to see since last year?" She missed the satisfied smile her friend directed toward her._

_"Who are you?" _

_"No, a better question is who are you? Who are you to waltz in here with an attitude and behave like you're the mistreated spouse? Bianca's loved ones don't owe you a damn thing. You can't pick and choose when you're going to be involved with your supposed family."_

_Switching her attention to Kendall, Reese unclenched her jaw. "May I speak with you privately?" _

_"Whatever you have to say to me, you can say in front of Marissa." _

_"Marissa?" She stared at the smaller of the two facing her while in thought. Both noticed when her light bulb clicked on. "Marissa Tasker? I remember your name from the documents. Bianca's attorney." She laughed without so much as an ounce of humor. "So Bianca's attorney is allowed to be in the ICU but I'm persona non grata. That makes a hell of a lot of sense."_

_"Marissa is much more than my sister's attorney," Kendall paused, wearing a smile so brilliant that she should have auditioned for a toothpaste commercial. "She's her lover!" She shook her head, reminiscent of her mother. When making the declaration that there was more than a client/attorney relationship, she sounded and even looked a bit like her except taller and with curlier hair. _

_"Wow." Eyes growing wide, Reese placed her hands on her hips. "Never thought Bianca would be so stereotypical as to sleep with her divorce lawyer." The tone of her voice was a combination of anger, hurt, jealousy and surprise. "So Kendall you allow this woman to take advantage of your little sister and you two are what? Buddies? Yet from the moment you awoke from your coma you never gave me a chance." _

_The grip on her purse strap tightening, Kendall took a step toward Reese, who managed to stand her ground. "Why you sanctimonious bi-" _

_"Excuse me ladies." The heated trio looked toward an approaching employee who Kendall and Marissa recognized as Bianca's evening nurse. They wholeheartedly approved of everyone on Bianca's medical team, but Stacy Winston was by far their favorite. She was congenial, attentive and hardworking. However, as she stopped before them congenial wouldn't describe her expression. "You're starting to draw attention to yourselves, so could you take this disagreement elsewhere?" Nurse Winston asked as politely as she could muster. _

_They took turns apologizing and then agreed to move their conversation to a corner table inside the waiting room. Once they were settled, Reese was the first to speak. Back pressed against the chair, she crossed one leg over the other and regarded Kendall with a faint smirk. "I believe you were in the middle of calling me a bitch, right?" _

_"Mmhmm. Don't forget sanctimonious." _

_Reese slowly nodded. "Of course." She glanced toward Marissa. "How long have you been sleeping with my wife?" _

_Hazel eyes narrowing, Marissa would have clenched her fists if one hand weren't freshly sprained and the other broken. "One, she's your ex-wife. Please get that through your head. Two, it really isn't any of your business since nothing whatsoever happened between us until months after your divorce was finalized. And three, I'm not just sleeping with Bianca. She's the woman I love, that I'm fully committed to and we're building a life together." Marissa attempted to blink away sudden tears. "She and those children are my world and they mean everything to me so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't trivialize something you know nothing about."_

_"Fine. I get it. The two of you are in love but Gabrielle and Miranda are still my children and I'm here to take care of them while their mother recovers from the shooting. And that confuses me." Taking a deep breath, Reese ran her fingers through her loose locks. "Why would JR Chandler shoot her? And the reporter didn't give a lot of information, but this all took place at a party?" She glanced between both women not caring which one answered. _

_"I'll give you the CliffsNotes version." Marissa took an even deeper breath. "I was married to JR and we divorced last year. This year he decided he wanted me back and tried pursuing me, but I was conflicted. Ultimately, I determined he wasn't what I wanted and I realized my feelings for Bianca ran much deeper than just friendship. We decided to be together, which he took quite terribly. He started heavily drinking, insulted us every chance he got, tried blackmailing and threatening us. Unfortunately, I was too naive to see how loose his grasp on sanity was until he put two bullets in my partner. And yes it was at a party that Adam Chandler hosted. JR hid in the tunnels like the rat bastard coward he is and Bianca was the only person in the room to spot him just before he pulled the trigger. It would have, it __**should **__have been me but she protected me by pushing me out of the way."_

_Marissa leaned forward, resting her arms on the table. "As for Gabby and Mimo and you taking care of them...I'm beyond suspicious. The last time you wanted to take care of them, you sent your lawyer and a nanny here to practically kidnap them so you could have the upper hand in France." When Reese opened her mouth, Marissa raised her splinted hand. "Don't even try to deny or explain it. I trust you about as far as I can throw you and I'll be damned if you get your hands on those girls while Bianca is in a coma. You haven't seen them in months and now all of the sudden you care? You care about them? You care about Bianca?_

_"Like you cared when Bianca's mother was missing last June? Like you cared when your absence added to the stress as Bianca comforted her sister when her husband's plane crashed into the ocean? It's obvious how much you cared when your children didn't see you on Thanksgiving and Christmas and when Miranda turned seven and Mama Reese wasn't there to celebrate it with her. It's obvious you cared when their...grandmother went missing the second time and then we learned she had been taken hostage. After you were offered that new job opportunity you seemed content to drop them like a bad habit. One moment you want full custody and the next aw never mind Bianca. You can keep them because architecture is so much more important to me."_

_"Nothing is more important to me than my children."_

_"Oh, bullshit," Kendall retorted, diving back into the conversation. "If that were true they would have seen you in the last year. Admit it. Work comes first for you and always will." _

_"I love them."_

_Marissa shook her head. "Not enough and we won't allow you to hurt them again. You're there and then you're not there and then you're there again. They're seven and three years old and they deserve so much better than an absentee parent. I believe in your own way that you love them because they are definitely easy to love. Your love just isn't stable enough. You're liable to stick around for a while but then you'll be searching for something else."_

_"Not this time. Okay, you're right." Reese used the fingers of both hands to sift through her hair. "I have been a lousy parent and I'm sorry about that. I'm here now." She searched their irate faces. "And I'm not going anywhere."_

_"For how long?" Kendall questioned. "A week? A month? I'd wager a month."_

_"Indefinitely. When I saw the news my heart dropped and I don't recall ever feeling so much fear. I've made more mistakes than I care to count where my ex-wife and children are concerned and I'm sorry. I know those are just words but I'm going to prove how much I do value them, love them. So I'm here now. I have some loose ends to tie up in Paris but I plan on moving here. Even if and hopefully she does, Bianca awakens tomorrow and is soon released from the hospital I'm not leaving. I want to be in Gabby and Miranda's lives. I want to earn back the right to call myself their parent. I'm not planning anything. I swear. I just want to show them that I love them too and I'd appreciate any time your family would allot me to reconnect with them."_

_Marissa and Kendall looked at each other and appeared to have a non-verbal discussion with their eyes. Seconds later they excused themselves to have an actual conversation elsewhere and when they returned, Marissa pushed her chair in front of Reese and sat down. "I'm gonna make this short yet not so sweet. You intend to stick around indefinitely, huh?" The older woman fervently nodded. "Great. Don't just say it, actually achieve it. I don't care what opportunity comes your way. If next month President Obama personally calls you and asks you to renovate the White House you remind yourself that nothing is more important to you than your children and politely decline. Don't you dare walk back into their lives unless you are two-hundred percent certain that you will remain there. If you cause those girls any further pain I'll make it my mission to unload a great deal of pain on you. Understand?"_

_While Kendall smirked in response to the glimmer of fear in her ex sister-in-law's eyes, Reese gulped and nodded concurrently. "I do. I completely understand."_

**#####**

Once the two women entered the ICU room, they dropped their belongings on the couch. While Maggie went to say good morning to the sleeping patient, Marissa searched for the roll of Scotch tape in her backpack so that she could position Miranda's painting on the wall. Tape located, she looked for an empty spot on the wall nearest her partner's bed and decided to place the painting between a crayon drawing done by Gabrielle and a greeting card created by AJ. She smiled, lightly running her fingers along Mimo's masterpiece.

"Lazybones when are you gonna wake up? We kinda miss you a whole bunch."

Marissa smiling at her cousin's words, walked toward them and stood on the opposite side. As she stroked dark hair, Maggie stepped away to check out the newest art. "Morning beautiful. Maggie is right. We sure do miss you a whole bunch." Gazing toward those lips she yearned to touch them and leaning down she did just that, tenderly pressing her lips to a pair so soft and sweet. It sure was nice to see that mouth again. Last week they received the positive news that Bianca was capable of breathing on her own so the endotracheal tube was removed and ever since she had been solo breathing like a champ. Now if Captain Kevlar awakened it would be the best news.

"You're a playa."

Dark brows raised as she stared at the blonde seated to her right. "What? Me a player?"

"No." She grinned and shook her head. "Play-ah. An 'a' replaces the 'er' at the end. I think that's the cool way the kids are saying it. Bianca Montgomery is a sure nuff playa."

"I'd ask if you were intoxicated but in this form we're not eating or drinking." Her friend laughed and she in turn smirked. "What makes me a playa?"

"Because you have game. You have so much game your ex-wife flew over from another country to check up on you, risking the wrath of your family." She indicated Maggie who was lounging on the couch, her eyelids already growing heavy with impending sleep. "And my cousin over there is a super busy medical resident driving back and forth from Philadelphia and it appears that she's managed to bond with your new love. In my opinion you're a playa. Of course the sweetest one ever!"

"Oh please." She may not eat or drink, yet Bianca discovered that she could blush in her current form.


End file.
